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female
,
anonymous
writes: I have been very close friends with this guy for 4 months, although I have known him forever. (he is younger than me). I am not sure how I stand with him. We definitely both fancy each other like crazy, but there has been nothing physical yet. When we returned home from an evening out recently, he asked me what I looked for in a guy so I am thinking he’s interested in me being his girlfriend. Then a week or so later, he referred to me as a friend which is fair enough as he hasn’t actually asked me out as his girlfriend. However, this evening he sent me a lovely message that ended by asking if it would be ok if we had a cuddle next time we saw each other as he was feeling a bit low right now. Am I right in saying this - that friends might hug but a cuddle strikes me as something a boyfriend/girlfriend would do? I feel confused - does he see me as his friend or his girlfriend? A bit of ‘fun’ or something more serious? He is very shy and sensitive and I don’t want to scare him off by trying to have an in depth conversation about whether we’re friends or girlfriend/boyfriend. I am quite shy myself and would welcome suggestions as to how to bring this subject up. I am thinking that the things he has been asking me suggests that he wants me to be his girlfriend but is too shy to ask outright. I need to know one way or the other though; I definitely don’t want to end up drifting into a ‘friends with benefits’ scenario which I think it is in danger of doing if we don’t clarify things.
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male
reader, Ryder  +, writes (10 May 2006):
 Hello,
I am quite familiar with this situation since i myself am shy and sensitive but to that extent :P
He definatley is interested in you and no friend would ask a girl what do you look for in a guy? he seems a bit worried that he does not have the requirements for you and wants to make sure hes up to your standards before making a move.
If you really want to make sure where you stand.. Then i suggest you make the first move anbd don't worry you will never scare him off, since the 2 of you have been friends for a long time and you are slowly getting closer together then it will take more than a kiss or a conversation to scare him off.
Try to get alone with him somewhere private where no one will see you, since hes shy. If the two of you are alone love plays its magic your feelings and emotions to each other will kickin and take over, eventually one of you will make a move and i suggest it be you because he might not fearing rejection. His response will definately show his feelings to you.
The next day or the day after you will probably get a nice msg saying i would love to take you out sometime or something but the kiss you both make will encourage him and show him that you have accepted him in your heart, that way he will be shy no more towards you.
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