A
female
age
16-17,
*x-Ellie-xX
writes:well.. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly two years now.. We're both seventeen. I love him very much and I can't imagin life without him. I get on on with him better than anyone else.. Everythings perfect except one thing! In recent months I have starred feeling jealous with him and other girls.. He lies a good bit but I don't think that's a real reason to be jealous. I don't know why I'm jealous but it's really bad and it causes a fights.. I can't help it though and I can't ignore it, I've been trying to get over it but I can't. Any advice on what I should do? I don't want to break up, but I can't help this jealous feeling I always get!! Will I grow out if it in A few more months?? Thank you!! X
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female
reader, Xx-Ellie-xX +, writes (18 October 2009):
Xx-Ellie-xX is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the advice! i have tried talking to him about the lying before, and he said he wont lie again, but after all the previous lying i dont know if i can trust him. things were alot better in our 1st years together, but now im thinking i might have to break it off.. whats a relationship without trust
A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga  + ♥, writes (18 October 2009):
 When people lie it is usually to hide something, i feel there is no room in any relationship for lying, it leads to trust issues, feelings of unhappiness, it gives you that feeling of something is not right all the time which is horrible to live with, so you have a right to feel annoyed.
The jealousy part is coming from what you think he is lying for? i.e other girls!
You need to chat with him and tell him how important it is he does not lie to you, how are you meant to trust him and be at ease with him if he lies?
Would he like you doing this to him? ask him and see what he says.
Gina
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A
female
reader, Basschick  + ♥, writes (18 October 2009):
 If he's lied to you, especially where other girls are concerned then subconsciously you are wondering what else is he lying about? You are jealous because you feel he is hiding things from you, things that could involve other girls and this mistrust you are having, is at the root of your jealousy. Actually in my opinion, jealousy is a healthy thing. I've been in relationships where I felt loved and respected and I never felt jealous about what that person was doing when we were apart; I never felt threatened by other women no matter how pretty they were because I felt like I was his #1. I've also been with guys who made me a crazy jealous bitch. Why? Because of the way they treated me, always acting like their eyes were on the door, always snapping their head to look at another woman, acting like I couldn't leave them alone in the same room with my best friend if she was at all attractive. Those kind of men will always make a woman feel threatened and jealous. And some men thrive on it as a form of control, or detachment. A man like that is not usually too serious about being with just one woman anyhow, and it gives him the perfect excuse to bail on the relationship and blame it on you. You mind as well learn these signs now, instead of later so you won't spend countless hours feeling bad about yourself and blaming yourself when a guy doesn't measure up to YOUR standards.
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A
female
reader, quiet-echo  + ♥, writes (18 October 2009):
 Lying is a very good reason to feel jealous. At the heart of jealousy is the fear or belief that we will lose something. In this case security in your relationship.If his lying hasn't triggered it, it may be exacerbating it. Take some personal notes of specific times and events that have sparked this feeling. You may see a pattern that you hadn't seen before.Another suggestion is to read online articles about jealousy and envy (the latter of which is often mistaken for the former). Many are rubish but some are very good and can offer some interesting insights.
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