A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:How does one accept that he must let go of somebody they love dearly? My girlfriend left me, after she decided that university would come between us. I have been supported by my good friends over the past couple of months, but I wonder if I'll ever truly be able to let go of something I wanted badly. I loved my girlfriend dearly. Our relationship was very special, and I have no doubt I'll remember it for the rest of my life. It just seems a shame that something as good as what we had has to be let go of. My friends say that it's all a matter of time, but is there nothing more I can do but wait for these wounds to heal? Thanks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 May 2008): There are several things you can do. Unfortunately (or fortunately) her memory will still be there and from time to time it will come back, sometimes with love, sometimes with pain associated. The positive thing about that is that it only means how much you cared (and still care) for her and that it meant something to you.
Many of us have been through it (some of us more than once). Here are some things you can do to help ease the painful moments (not all of them pertain to all situations)
1. Put yourself into a project/work/school/ 110% to exhaustion
2. Force yourself to think of other things when her memory come up in your mind (think about this ahead of time so that you have thoughts to go to when it happens...and it will)
3. Get into another relationship. It does not have to be one that you see yourself in forever, just someone new
4. When the memories wont go away and your feeling sorry for yourself, think of the things and times that she did things you didn't like (this will help but wont fix the issue, its just a band aid)
5. Don't and "I repeat" DON'T go around saying "if only I had done this differently" (it would not have been different even if she said it would have been..thats just a cop out)
6. Don't keep looking for her online or looking for e-mails from her, block her and throw away the block code so you wont be tempted to look for her.
7. Don't call or (keep calling) to just say hi, or can we be friends (you know thats not honest to yourself and it is not honest to your relationship). Make a clean break.
8. Its ok to cry...often and long, eventually (sooner than you think) you wont be able to cry about it anymore
9. This is the "BIG ONE" "TIME HEALS". When you get injured it takes time to heal your body, same with your emotions. This is the one you cant speed along or slow down.
Your not in this alone, I have and am going through it and I don't always listen to my own advice or do the things I know I should do but when I do they do help. Remember your a good person, there is someone out there for you and there waiting for you to find them.
God bless
John
A
female
reader, bayleex +, writes (18 January 2008):
 You will never forget you first love she will always be in your thoughts. It is going to be difficult for a while but the best thing to do is be around your friends. Your only young, so go out and enjoy yourself you never know you could meet someone.
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A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse + ♥, writes (18 January 2008):
 Unfortunately, I know it's not much comfort but it does take time. There are things you can do to help you through this though. I've recently been going through this myself and this is what has worked for me:http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-get-over-your-ex.html
Hope it helps and best of luck :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2008): It is good that you have friends to support you and give you wise and advice. It is true that time heals. This is something you need to get used to in life as unfortunately there are painful times in everyone's life.
Are you going out and doing things to keep your mind off your ex-girlfriend? There will be times when thoughts of her will creep into your mind, but they will become less and less.
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A
female
reader, Annalisa + ♥, writes (18 January 2008):
 Unfortunately, you can only give it time. Who knows, you might find each other again in the future!
In any case, you just have to put it down to experience.
You will heal and find love again, which will probably be even more meaningful.
Is it worth thinking about why she thinks University will get in the way? If she thinks she'll meet someone else and want to leave you, than let her go! Anything else you might be able to discuss and try to deal with.
Good luck!
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