A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I became very good friends with my neighbour who was (is) in a very unhappy marriage. He did not even need to tell myself, my husband of 9 years (at the time)or our tennant. She mistreats and isolates him as badly as my ex mistreated and isolated me. We both cut off our family as a result. Long story so I will sum it - please follow closely. After my ex and I moved 2 blocks down(very small town) he confided in me how he felt, we had an affair (continue to do so), my ex got ahold of e-mails between us and dropped them off and mailed them to his wife while he was working in a different country. His wife showed the neighbour (they were friends at the time) and she chalked it up to my ex causing problems. The neighbour who was supposed to be his wife's friend ended up suing my boyfriend and now his wife is not talking to the neighbour. The neighbour saw my facebook profile which included pictures of he and I in the country where he was working and said she is going to tell his wife who she is desperate to repair the friendship with. Fairly certain she saved the pictures as she told me she enlarged thenm before I deleted my facebook account. My question is do you really think she is going to tell his wife? Would this not make the friendship cease forever?Thank you.
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affair, facebook, my ex, neighbour Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eddie +, writes (17 September 2007):
 If you didn't enjoy being the victim of many affairs, why would you perpetuate the lifestyle by living it for yourself and playing that game. Reality and truth are not always pleasant. I'll stand by what I said, playing with fire hurts. Denial does not make something proper.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSome answers are very helpful and some are not. I was the victim of affairs with my husband. I have left him. The one about "playing with fire" was rather useless as being judgemental is really not constructive. This pretty much sums up why people stay in bad marriages without another person invovled - others can be so easily decieved into being judgemental and point fingers as to why the marriage ended. I do agree he needs to find the courage to leave as I have already done so. Abuse takes many shapes and forms and men are as subjucted as women. I remained because I allowed myself to be isolated cutting off my family and friends. He remains for the same reason and even more so he does not want her blaming him (to the children) for the end of the marriage. I have endured the same process. Thank you so much for the words of wisdom all.
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A
male
reader, eddie +, writes (16 September 2007):
She will do what she chooses to do and you'll live with the consequences. Nobody can guess about what a stranger will do in any circumstances. Playing with fire hurts....right?
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A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (16 September 2007):
 I think you have bigger problems than worrying about your b/f's wife and whether her friendship with the neighbor is going to be damaged. You and this man cannot continue this charade any longer. If he is unhappy in his marriage, as he claims to be then he needs to get out of it. It would also be wise for you to do the same. If the two of you want to be together, you both need to divorce your spouses and move out of that neighborhood, and begin yoru life together. This drama is only going to blow up in your face if you continue thinking your sneaking around. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7  +, writes (16 September 2007):
I think the odds are good she has the pictures. Try to cut a deal with her. Clue the bf in on what is going on.
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (16 September 2007):
 If she has proof that she was right, of course she is going to tell. The cat's out of the bag on this one.
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