A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So this guy used to be interested in me. Now he's not anymore. He goes from relationship to relationship where the girls either cheat on him with his friends, or leave him because they aren't that into him. Or they break up for some other dumb reason. We never dated but I did like him but I have decided to move on. Did I make the right choice? Will he ever realize his mistake? I read books and ride my bike everyday. I also like to write. Any other ways for me to try to get over him? I plan on only texting him on holidays like happy birthday, happy thanksgiving, merry christmas, and then eventually just never texting him ever again.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2012): My point is, he gets into long term relationships where people end up hurting him and he never gave me a chance at a long term relationship with him. His mistake was never giving me a chance. I understand that people can't help who they have feelings for or they can't help that they lose interest. But being fickle while pretending you are looking for something serious is kind of high schoolish.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (20 June 2012):
Hi there. It sounds like you are doing all the right things to move on with your life.
You are keeping yourself busy and that's important.
I guess that's ok to text him - "Happy Birthday, Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas".
It seems pretty harmless really, and at the very least it lets him see you are still thinking of him, at least as a friend.
It just depends on what you hope to achieve by it, I guess.
There is nothing wrong with being friends, and you can never have too many friends.
Perhaps you could if you wanted to, ask him for a coffee at a local cafe and just catch up.
That's up to you really.
It really depends though, on what you want it to be between you and him, doesn't it?
It depends on your expectations.
I believe that what you are feeling now, is - "What if?"
The wondering of what it could have been like between you both, had you have started dating, back then.
I don't think you can do any more than you are right now, to get over him.
The other important thing to do, is to go out with your friends regularly and put yourself back into circulation once more.
That will stop you dwelling on what could have been, and it will distract you from those feelings as well.
Another thing you could do, is to begin some interesting hobbies where you meet lots of new people to make friends with, and through those friendships you could also meet some nice eligible young men, who you will have some nice times with.
You could also look through your yellow pages telephone directory under clubs, or hobbies etc., to give you some ideas on what might interest you.
The more you can do with your life to make it interesting and fun, the more happiness you bring back into your life again.
And surely, that's worth considering.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2012): "I plan on only texting him on holidays like happy birthday, happy thanksgiving, merry christmas, and then eventually just never texting him ever again. "
If you plan to eventually never text him again, then why not start immediately? Why bother with texting on special occasions? what's the point?
"We never dated but I did like him but I have decided to move on. Did I make the right choice?"
Depends on why you decided to move on? Is it because he lost interest in you first? If so then yes you absolutely made the right choice.
"Will he ever realize his mistake?"
Not sure what mistake it is that he has made? maybe he's perfectly happy with the casual dating scene and not getting into a long term relationship with anyone.
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (20 June 2012):
Did he make the mistake or you? All these things u describe yourself with relatively have very little to do with him. He's allowed to change his mind after all. Can't really expect someone to realize a mistake in your case if they never knew the person.
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