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Will I lose him to my "friend"?

Tagged as: Three is a crowd<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 February 2005) 5 Answers - (Newest, 8 February 2007)
A , anonymous writes:

My best-friend has been flirtiing with my boyfriend. Do you think my boyfriend will fall for her even if he loves me ?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2007):

I have no idea what to tell you. But I know how you feel. My "best friend" was flirting with my boyfriend today, and he was flirting back. He calls me a slut so he saw nothing wrong. Good luck

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A reader, Starr, writes (12 February 2005):

First of all you do not have to put up with any of this.If it where me, she would'nt even be a friend of mine.You should stop her in her tracks girlfriend you have a mouth,open it.Let her know that you are not stupid and you know what she's doing.She would'nt even be welcome to my house let alone aroud my boyfriend.If you don't open your mouth it's going to continue to happen.this woman is disrespecting you and stepping all over your friendship.If there is a question about you loosing him to her you need to step up and claim whats yours as far as your boyfriend goes,if he shows no interest in her don't worry about him but please loose the friend.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2005):

If he loves you, he'll keep away from your "friend". Although I'd be question how much of a friend she is, if she's flirting with your guy.

If he fall for her, then he didnt really love you, and you're better off without.

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A reader, Simon, writes (11 February 2005):

Your friend is out of order if you are feeling threatened but some times confronting the situation head on can do more harm than good.

I take it your friend doesn't have a boyfriend at the moment. She also may spend alot of time with you and your boyfriend, maybe hanging about as a threesome, or in a group of your female friends? A couple of ways to stop the flirting are: Spend more seperate time between them. Don't give them as much time together. You won't lose her as a friend if you spend less time with her, it is what happens when friends have partners. Make time for her though, don't just 'never see her' because you are 'always with your boyfriend'. Or vice versa. Share your time out.

When you are together maybe try to hold his hand or touch him in someway to remind both of them, physically and visually, who he is with. If you are going out somewhere with both of them, maybe see if your boyfriend can bring a pal of his along, not necessarily as a 'set-up' but just as a 'the-more-the-merrier'. Her unwanted attentions will stop when she gets a boyfriend of her own, maybe you can help her out!

Hope this is of some sort of help.

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A reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (11 February 2005):

Rebecca Batchelor agony auntIs she really your best friend? She isn't exactly loyal, is she?

To put it simply, your boyfriend isn't likely to fall for her charms if he truly loves you but obviously, there would always remain a bit of a doubt.

What does he say about this? Is he enjoying the attention? Is he reassuring you? You need to find out what he thinks and feels so that you can feel more secure.

As for your 'friend', I guess you could ask her to stop but then that might convey you in a rather untrusting light. You could have a word with her though and explain that you wouldn't dream of doing the same thing to her as you thought you were friends.

I hope this helps.

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