A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I can't wrap my head around why a good looking guy would like me or even find me attractive? He could get a really gorgeous girl, so why me?When we met in a bar a week ago, he said he thought I was attractive and had to get my number and see me again. I gave him my number but thought nothing would happen from it, but he asked me out and the impression so far is he doesn't play them stupid games that every other guy does, it's nice.I have low self esteem, especially when it's a good looking guy taking an interest in me! I do think i'm pretty, but for some reason I always compare myself to other girls and wonder why a guy would like me. It's as if it's too good to be true. I have prepared myself for dissapointment which is so cynical to do I know! But I can't think positively about this leading anywhere or turning into something good and proper. He probably just wants to sleep with me and that's it, not any actual interest! ....If you haven't guessed guys have messed me around a lot, so i'm used to disappointment. How can I stop thinking like this? I don't want to be expecting disappointment with every guy I meet and think so negatively about them and doubt myself and compare to other girls all the time!??
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female
reader, chickpea2011  +, writes (13 January 2012):
 Hi,
Just know that you are beautiful, attractive and deserve a good, nice, good looking guy. Just enjoy getting to know him, he obviously likes you and see many qualities in you, besides looks... We all have been through bad experiences in the past, but you shouldn't let the past control your future. Just because you met few bad guys, doens't mean all guys are bad. Try not to think too much, why, etc... Enjoy and just know that you deserve to be happy...
Good luck/nest wishes
A
male
reader, SonOfMan  +, writes (13 January 2012):
 The fact is we project what we think and our thoughts become our world.
If you keep thinking like that then the likelihood is that you will act that way around the guy and sooner or later you will get disappointed. Believe me it has happened to me before, not just in relationships but many things in life.
Why do you compare yourself to other people? I know its easier said than done but you need to make a conscious effort not to as this doesn't change anything. Instead, compare yourself to great role models who are confident in themselves and who inspire you.
If you have bad thoughts about a guy who may be using you then that's different. You should take it easy and get to know the person before jumping into anything you may regret.
There is obviously something about you people like so don't put yourself down. We are all different and our likes and dislikes are just as varied as we are.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (13 January 2012):
 Maybe you're hot and you don't see yourself that way?
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