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age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: What do I do? My long distance boyfriend of about 6 years off and on was talking to me on the phone yesterday, and i was telling him about something important, i might have a brain tumor and have to go get checked next week. he wasn't even listening and said he had to go right when i was talking. then, later in the day i called and he was talking to his friend the whole time, and i never understood if he was talking to me or not, so i just hung up. i was on my way to church anyway, and he knew that, but he called me twice and left a nasty message saying i embarassed him in front of his friends because i hung up on him, and that they thought it was a joke, and he went on and on about how disrespectful i was. i told him it was rude to talk to his friends the whole time i was on the phone with him. now, looking at it objectively i'm sure you all think i was being disrespectful, but if i give you some background information you might think differently. My boyfriend has hung on me probably literally 1,000 times over the course of our relationship. it got so bad at one point that he did it almost everytime we spoke on the phone. but he never seemed to think it was disrespectful when he was doing it. anyway, last night after all this he texted me and said he needs time on his own. i said break or no break i just don't want to be with him anymore at all, ever. of course he didn't respond. he always likes it when he has control and likes when i call or text him and he doesn't answer. my question is, how could he actually say that and mean it if i put up with his same behavior but way worse for years?! especially after just last week he was saying how much he wanted to marry me and start a family with me?? is this just an easy way out for him to date other girls? lately, i've been really busy and if i don't laugh at all of his jokes he gets very angry and thinks i don't love him anymore. and in the past it was always me breaking up with him, so does this mean he's just trying to control me? would other people hang up on their boyfriend if he was talking to his friends the whole time anyway? was my behavior justified?
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female
reader, person12345  +, writes (20 March 2011):
 It's not OK for him to hang up on you or for you to hang up on him! That's incredibly rude and inconsiderate, and shows you no respect at all. You should find a new boyfriend.
A
female
reader, fi_the_tree  +, writes (20 March 2011):
 He's being rude, simple as. How dare he think that there's on rule for him, and another for you!!!!!!
Dump his sorry arse now!!!
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A
female
reader, feelingsputtogether +, writes (20 March 2011):
 honestly sounds like he controls the phone conversations you have. If he is a long distance relationship and he is acting this way, imagine if you saw each other on a daily basis. I'm sorry but sound like this is something that he would do if he had you infront of him. You don't have to put up with this right now especially because it sounds like you are going through some tough times. He will try and take you on a guilt trip which it looks like he already started. Just cut him loose and findyourself someone that will respect you and give you the attention you deserve whether it is on the phone or in person. Your behavior towards him was the right one, you were trying to explain to him the rough patch you are going through and he ovbiously was not interested enough to care. You don't need that right now. Focus on yourself. Good luck and hope all turns out well for you.
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