A
female
age
36-40,
*ixieGwen
writes:This is ridiculous but I've been ocassionally sending txts to my ex - wishing him well.Last time we spoke we had a huge arguement and he said he was going M.I.A. for awhile.(he went from adoring/infatuation w/ me to in a flip of a switch,wanting to break up w/ out a real reason)After we broke up, he wanted to be in good terms/be friends - didnt want me hating him. We saw each other a handful of times after,had sex and we were super friendly, he tried to make me jealous and was confusing - seemed he didnt know what he wanted and at the same time was having alot of issues financially.He's always been reliable and the last time I saw him he seemed lost/sad..like a diff person.He agreed to see me over the wknd but flaked and when called out on it - he blew up like he never made a mistake.He mentioned going M.I.A cos he needed to take care of things in his life and thats the last I heard from him.I worry about him cos it seemed to be a difficult time for him and I just wish he would talk to me. I'm not asking for us to get back together or to hang and be BFFS.. lolIt kills me not knowing how hes doing. He ignores all my msgs but he cant possibly hate me because I was always nice to him and he even said I did alot for him/for us.I've been dating others and constantly keep myself busy but hes still at the back of my mind.
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female
reader, PixieGwen +, writes (23 October 2009):
PixieGwen is verified as being by the original poster of the question If he moved on.. he wouldnt have been hanging w/ me while supposedly dating another person or msg to tell me he got hit by a car etc.He doesnt serial date.Besides us hanging out wasnt physical*happened just once*.so thats not an excuse/reason. Him ignoring me - sucks. Maybe he IS a douche & maybe he doesnt want me to see him vulnerable like Jmtmj said..(im sure its the latter..cos of the way he is) but I'm mainly venting..cos ill never know & will eventually stop bothering w/ contacting him.
Anyway - thanks for the replies..
A
female
reader, PixieGwen +, writes (23 October 2009):
PixieGwen is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni didnt nag him..
hes the one that made plans & flaked. its rude regardless of who u are. I didnt ask him to hang around or to make plans w/ me.but he did. went back n forth w/ me.
and hes the one thats been acting like i broke up w/ him.
I just knew he was goin through a tough time recently.. so regardless of our past - im curious if hes better.. and just because hes an ex ..doesnt mean i cant care.
i guess me posting on here was mainly venting..
eventually ill give up and stop worrying about him..
but i thought id see what people would have to say bout it.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (23 October 2009):
 Yeh... the silent treatment, thats a classic move, I'm not going to say I'm not guilty of it, because it works. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. However, there could be a chance that he doesnt want you to see him in a vulnerable state.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (23 October 2009):
This probably isn't the answer that you're looking for, but I'm going to be blunt: he's ignoring you because he's a douche. Don't worry about him because he's not worrying about you. The end.
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A
female
reader, Lexie88 +, writes (23 October 2009):
 Does it matter? he's your ex, he's in the past. Even though you say you're not asking to get back together, you still want something.
I hope you don't take this the wrong way but he's ignoring you because he doesn't want you anymore, you don't matter to him. He broke up with you, then had sex with you and now he's ignoring you. What he's done is said I don't want you, but let's have sex anyway since I'm not getting it anywhere else, and now...I've found someone else so you don't matter and I don't want you.
You still care but why? Maybe you want to be 'friends' but he clearly doesn't see the use in that. He's had you, he doesn't need you anymore and it's as simple as that for him.
He's not confusing you. You're confusing yourself by sending texts to someone who dumped you, having sex with them outiside a committed relationship, and also nagging them for not showing up as arranged.
He went along with it because he didn't know how to say no and he didn't want to hurt your feelings. He's had enough and now he's gone mia.
You need to let it go and concentrate on these other guys you've been dating. This guy is finished with you and why do you want to run after someone who doesn't want you?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2009): Seems like you like him, but not into the title of - girlfriend or wife. More as "Sex-buddies'. I guess he's moving on, you should too...
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