A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband's brother and his wife never invite us anywhere. They have parties and get togethers and we aren't invited. I personally think it is because I used to date a guy that is in their "circle", but what is odd is that they were never friends with my ex before (when I was with him) and now it's as though they are especially nice to him. My ex is weird and his social skills are really lacking, so I don't see why they even want to hang out with him at all. The "circle" of friends used to make fun of my ex and ask why he was there, because at parties and such he would just show up uninvited and sit there and not even talk to anybody. I'll admit, my husband's brother's wife didn't like me when I used to hang out in the "circle" when I was dating my ex. There was no reason for it, except that when I drank I got a little obnoxious. That was years ago though, and they know I have settled down immensly since then. They are both really nice to me now, and they both act like they like me. So I really don't know what is going on, but my husband's feelings often are hurt when my ex is invited over him. He and his brother are only a year apart and were really close before, and all hung out with the same people. But now it seems they have cut my husband out. I can only assume that it is because of me, but this seems wrong that they choose my ex over their family (my husband) especially since they never even liked my ex before. Any ideas?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (26 April 2008):
 You should ask them. That's the only way to really get the true answer.
One thought though. Stop talking about your ex. This issue is you're not being invited. Don't make it more complicated to assume your ex has something to do with that fact. If that was true, you'd have two separate issues and not one combined because your not being invited and his being invited really have no direct association because one can't (or shouldn't) change or impact the other one.
I'd just let them know you're both bothered by this, and discuss it so the issue can be resolved.
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