A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met my now girlfriend on a Friday night 3 months ago, went out, partied, had a great time. We went back to a friends, ended up talking, kissing goodnight, and had some mutal interest. The next day we exachanged numbers and like all times i've met someone, had a wonder if we'd even end up on a date, actually like each other, etc... I went out the following night, kissed another girl I've had a past with. I told my girlfriend when we had the "sex talk" that this was a girl I slept with a while back, but didn't include we kissed the night before mine and my girlfriends first date. I didn't think it wasn't important, just due to us never going on a date yet. Do i have to tell her? I feel like if I did tell her, it'd make her think twice about this girl that we see occasionally. My girlfriend is my life, and after that first date, I've never looked at another girl, touched another girl, etc. Why do I feel guilty? i don't think this is cheating. My friends tell me I'm crazy for worrying about this.
View related questions:
kissing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (25 October 2010):
 I also think you are crazy for worrying about this. YOU HAD ONLY JUST MET THE OTHER GIRL, AND DIDN'T KNOW IF YOU WOULD EVER EVEN SEE HER AGAIN.
Forget this nonsense. Don't tell her anything. Get on with getting to know her, and forget about something that is insignificant and unimportant.
If you had started a proper relationship, and then had sexual contact with someone else, that would be different - BUT YOU HADN'T.
A
male
reader, TimmD  +, writes (25 October 2010):
 Don't tell her. You are beating yourself up for nothing. Who knows if she would have called you back? Who knows if you would have actually like each other enough to date? Anything could have happened.
On this site I've always been one for preaching honesty. Especially when it comes to cheating. This, on the other hand? This is not cheating. Your friends are right... don't worry about this.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): You didn't cheat by kissing that other girl before you and your current girlfriend got together. You shouldn't feel guilty about that.
However, if you are still hanging out with this girl with whom you've had a sexual past, pretending like she was nothing to you, maybe you are feeling guilty about that? I'd say your girlfriend won't care about the kiss, but she might care that you're still hanging out with someone you used to sleep with. (I'm not sure if your girlfriend is totally aware of the whole situation...)
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): I'd also like to include that this girl i kissed is a friend of mine. I don't think there are feelings there with either of us, just made a mistake about a year ago after a night out, promised we wouldn't let it ruin our friendship. The kiss I think was just two single people having too much to drink and thinking that it wasn't a big deal. If i knew what I know now, that the next day I'd go out with a new girl, really like her, and think she could be the one, I wouldn't have ever been kissing other girls or anything the night before a first date. I want to be open with my girlfriend, but at the same time, i don't want to know any every single action that she's ever made, unless its happened since we started dating. Am i better off just not bringing it up because I've told her I've slept with this person a year ago, and just let whatever happen prior to us going on our first date be the past?
...............................
|
