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Why did he change his mind about getting married?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 December 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 4 December 2009)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Both of us have been married twice, we have been together 2 yrs and known each other for 8+. When we first got together we both wanted the same thing to get married again one day but now 2 yrs later he is saying that he doesn't want to do it again. He feels as if we already are and is very happy with the way things are. To hear this crushed me. I respect his feelings but can't change mine. Why did this change and will he change his mind again?

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A female reader, RichTea United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2009):

RichTea agony auntIm very sorry to hear that he has decided he doesnt want to get married.

The most likely reason he doesnt want to get married is because he has been married twice already and doesnt want to get hurt a third time. Maybe he feels that getting married will ruin the relationship you have with eachother. You said that he says he feels as if you are already married, so getting married officailly might ruin the way things are between you.

You should try talking to him to find out what the reason is that he doesnt want to get married.

Your right, there isnt really anything you can do about the way you feel but indure it. You should try and think about how you would feel if you didnt get married or if you waited a few years.

It sounds as though the main reason he doesnt want to get married is because he is too scared about getting hurt again.

Good Luck

x

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2009):

He's been married twice, and doesn't want it to go wrong for a third time. I don't think he will change his mind to be honest with you. If you really want that wedding again, you need to end it know, or you will have wasted your time.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (4 December 2009):

eyeswideopen agony auntHe might change his mind and he might just decide that twice married twice shy. The important thing is whether you can accept and be content with his decision one way or the other. If you truly want and need that ring on your finger then you might not want to spend years on this relationship only to be disappointed.

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