A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've never had much luck when it comes to keeping friends, and i kow it's all my own doing. But if i knew exactly what i was doing wrong, i would change, but i don't. Even though i have quite alott of mates, nobody seems to get close or want to get close with me.In primary school i used to constantly fall out with one of my best mates, which lead to the falling out of all of my mates, just because they kind of "followed her". Its hard to explain without going into too much detail, but i know its what i'm doing which is why i always end up like this. I thought i'd finally found my "best mates" when i went up to secondry school, but that didn't last long as everybody else started to fall out and turn against each other. And my closest friend throughout all that all of a sudden turned against me.I know it's all hormones and part of growing up, but it seems to be never ending. and its really getting me down. I spend my life on my own in my room doing absolutly nothing, and at school i generally tend to walk around by myself otherwise i feel like i'm intruding into everyone elses friendships.I'm a pretty shy person, and can't really keep a conversation running for too long unless i'm with someone i feel comfortable with, but i am a friendly person and can generally get along with most people.Its just everybody seems so have settled into their own groups now, where as i don't seem to fit in anywhere. It might sound like a paranoid teenager, but until you know what i've actally been through, its hard to understand.Right, i've babbled on abit here, but;does anyone know what is it that i'm doing wrong?any advice would be greatt, thanks (:
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female
reader, softballplaya  +, writes (20 May 2008):
 school is very rough, trust me im going through the same things hun. Keeping friends seems to be a constant battle because when you finally the trust of one your losing the trust of another..=(. One sure fire way to keep friends is to not be two-faced because eventually they all catch on and thats bad. Keep a good attitude becasue more people want to be around a happy nice person rather than a negative one. With this day and age you will rarely get someone to go out of their way to make friends, so my advice is if they wont go the extra mile then mabey you should. Nothing wrong with going the extra step. Girl dont be a wall flower, go out and have fun. start talking=] Yes hormones do have alot to do with things nowadays, your absolutley right. Its a shame that the people who you have stuck by will turn against you so fast and forget that you were always there...all because of someone more "popular" ugh stereotypes disgust me. Be your own person, dont let people twist and contort you to make friends. Anyways I guess you could say im kinda babbling on and on but if you need any help im always here for you
take care && good luck
=]
A
male
reader, jezman +, writes (20 May 2008):
 i noticed that in the first years of high school many of the girls in my form were having random arguments and they would always be splitting up, leaving it into the hands of my form tutor.i've found that there's always a group of friends inside school that are all accepting, there must be someone who shares your interests!my advice is to go to school clubs you enjoy, i met loads of mates through school clubs because we shared an interest! groups settle and seperate throughout the school years, people very rarely stay in the same group of friends for their whole time at high school so just because you dont feel accepted doesn't mean that this is the end.people change and so will you. i was shy at first but then at the end of school i would happily stand in front of my year and perform.
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