A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I started a fight with my bf ealier today, i felt bad. So to make it up to him I told him he could do a certain sexual act on me that for months and months i told him he couldn't b/c it just wasn't my cup of tea.Well I figured he'd just jump right to it and wouldn't give a damn if he did it.But instead he didn't bother, he started to but he just didn't.Now i'm upset b/c i told him he could and he didn't do it. Why is that I'm wondering? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 January 2010):
Because he didn't need revenge, and he did't need permission to do something that he knows you don't like. He's clearly a good guy, so just say sorry for starting the fight and move forward. He respects the fact you didn't like the act, so al you're now doing is pushing him away.
A
female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (14 January 2010):
 ...coz no one likes charity sex?
I know I would knock something back if only offered as compensation to mask another issue.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (14 January 2010):
 He did not do it because it is a violation of his emotional needs that the only reason you were willing to give him the sex act he wanted, was because you felt you had to make something up to him.
If the only reason you are willing to do it is because you are looking for some self punishment, it attacks his own sense of identity (emotionally).
If you are looking to push him away, you are doing a very good job.
-Frank
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (14 January 2010):
 Nice answers but i will say make up sex can be pretty good, but if your guy wanted to do some kind of strange thing with you and your not into it could def kill the vibe. Even though you told him he could do it he could tell you didnt want to i dont blame him for just saying screw it well actually he didnt
u kno what i mean and you could have said what it was the suspense is is dreadful.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2010): WOW, you tell him no for months, then yes, (and he KNOWS your not into it) and then he starts and then stops (prior to) and your MAD? Maybe you should be happy that he cared enough NOT to...
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A
male
reader, demon2004 +, writes (14 January 2010):
 Because sometime in the future you would start to regrett letting him do it and you would have some animosity towards him and it would affect your relationship and he new this so he will wait until your a willing particapent in the encounter
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A
female
reader, Frenzotic +, writes (14 January 2010):
 You have to be in the mood for sexual activity which he won't be after a fight. As well as that, you using this to say sorry may not seem right.Don't use sex/sexual activity as sorry. He's probably hurt by that thought.
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