A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I would prefer if Men answered this but any answers I get i will be gratefulI,m sick and tired of men using me. I only ever kissed 3 men before and when we text they just seem less interested and then they just stop texting me. Now i can admit I,m a bit overweight but I want to know what Men hate in women I think its more than just my weight that bothers most guys i,m with but still i need to know what i could be doing wrong so if anyone can tell me a couple of things that men can't handle woth women please please PLEASE Let me know xxxx
View related questions:
overweight, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (31 July 2011):
 you just haven't met the right one, by being overweight you are limiting the number of men who will be interested (sorry, but its true!) so do something about it - get fit, healthy and confident!
slim gorgeous women meet idiots and players too though, women with great personalities do too!
all you can do is carry on giving men a chance, don't be put off. learn to quickly spot the signs of someone who isn't genuine. study the subject. will save you a lot of confusion and heartache in the future
x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo fatherly advice I know my title is very harsh toward men but if i may defend myself it was more of a heat of the moment as i had gotten frustrated at the way i felt treated and this has happened me before. I understand if you find/think my defense doesn't matter and that i shouldn't have done it and for that I apologize
xxx
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice  + ♥, writes (31 July 2011):
 Thanks for writing back. Ive got to say that after a night of chatting, his turning cold doesn't make sense. Way back when I used to blind date a lot. I thought set ups were a great way to meet new people. Unfortunately many turned out the way yours did with no call back or even worse a last minute cancellation. I think there is some sort of stigma attached to the whole situation. Like an assumption that anyone who would accept a blind date must not be able to get a date. Or, it could just be the initial mutual attraction that is missing.
I do worry about your title a lot. It indicates a certain contempt towards all men. That kind of attitude, even if you try to hide it, is going to be a big turn off.
FA
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your answers. To Fatherly Advice thank you for taking the time to read this and yes i did the title. Well to elaborate to Annonymous. I had been introduced to him last week by his sister who is a friend of mine. at first i didnt mention anything as i was shy but the other night we went out abd started to talk. Even some people we met out were talking to him and telling him good things about me like " lovely person , sweet , funny " We chatted a lot over the night like what we worked as, did we have bf/gf and other general stuff before we snogged. The main thing I can focus on is that the day we met and the night we went out he kept looking in a good way
...............................
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (31 July 2011):
 This happened to one of best friends. In all honesty, she's overweight but she's funny, lively, friendly, caring and basically everything a good man would want in a good woman (with the exception of the more superficial qualities which she is driven to work on). She thought is was her weight that repulsed men since she hadn't found anyone who would care about her and think of her in a romantic way, she kept asking me if I ever would consider dating her and I told her the truth, I said yes, I had considered it but the fact of the matter was (and this is the honest to god truth), we had been friends for far too long.
She's had boyfriends before but none ever really cared about her, they were all too wrong for her. We all go clubbing a lot, drinking, dancing, she's made out with a lot of people which to her is a surprise and I tell her, she's not ugly, she's just overweight. Her insecurities were cast aside now, knowing that being overweight has nothing to do with anything except maybe health. About two weeks ago she met someone who she has fallen for completely and he has fallen for her. She's happier than I have ever seen her. He's different than the others, I know that for a fact, he's much better and he genuinely cares about her.
Whatever you might be thinking about yourself, cast those thoughts aside. You aren't doing anything wrong. You also need to cast aside what prejudices against the male gender you might be forming because you will only find that it does nothing but burden you in the future. There are good men and bad men, same with women, the other side of the coin is not innocent of using people, nor being superficial. Attitude is the near-essence of finding someone and it might be difficult but you also need to push through it because patience is the other half of the key to finding someone. You seem to have only met the wrong type of men. Try to not be offended by what anyone else has done to the past, if you meet someone new, treat them as such, someone NEW, no expectations of what they must be like unless you see sure signs that a jerk is who they are.
I hope that helps.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): It's next to impossible to say what you're doing wrong because you haven't told us what exactly you've been doing, besides texting. Can you elaborate a little?
When and where did you meet these men? How long after talking to you did they appear to distance themselves? What sorts of things did you talk about (for instance, did you tell them about your bad luck with men?) What happened just before that? Have any of them offered up any reason or do they just disappear? What feedback, if any, have your friends given you?
...............................
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (31 July 2011):
OP, did you write the title to this? Because if you did, the answer is obvious.
FA
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2011): Do not just kiss men whenever they ask you or you get a chance. Wait for the right person who understands you and who cares for you. You are meeting random guys and kissing them and planning your future with them. Get a life girl!!! You are giving a chance to others to use you and then you are blaming them. This is not right. I hope you get it right. You need to wait till you find the person you can spend your life with. He will love you as you are and will not try to change you. He is there somewhere sweetie!!! Every person is beautiful in someway and I am sure you are. Do not change yourself just for the relationship sake. This will not work. Best of luck!!!!
...............................
|
