A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:This guy and I dated for about 6 months. We broke up because he didnt think I was ready for a relationship, basically, and told me he still cares for me.I made the mistake of talking to him constantly, and arranged to see him twice (the second time almost led to being too intimate, but I stopped it all). I had asked him to give us another try.He finally came out and told me that he needed time to figure out what he wanted. He said he did like me, but he didnt know what he wanted, except a stress-free life. And that there is a lot going on in his life right now. He said I'm very special to him. So I replied with I understand, I'd like us to still see each other and worry about a relationship later. That was July 5.So basically I've been NOT contacting him at all. Only 4 days after I started this, he called/texted me the whole weekend "just to say hi" and wanted to "hear my voice". Then now it has turned into texting every other day to say hi and see how I'm doing, or what I'm doing. One day last week he asked me to give him a ride home from work (idk why he couldn't have called anyone else). I decided to do it, after awhile of thinking about it. So we went to his house and I stayed for awhile. He acted as though we hadn't broken up (touchy-feely, cuddly, and I initiated having sex with him, but I stopped that again).Since I havent been contacting him, I've been getting out of my house everyday and seeing friends, and having fun. 3 days after I just saw him and no contact with him, I was out with some friends that night. I checked my phone and he had sent me a text asking me "how I was, and if I was mad at him." I said of course not. Then he sent me a text later that said "well i wanted to say good night and have a good day tomorrow :)"Someone PLEASE give me insight of whats going on here. Is this his way of taking things slowly back in? Is this a way of him stringing me along? Based on his information is there a possibility of a relationship? Here are my options that I'm deciding between, if I could have some opinions...A.) Leave lines of communication open.B.) Cut him off completelyC.) Tell him that I don't know what he wants from me, but I'm moving on. THEN cut him off. (should i wait for opportunity, or just come out and say it??)
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female
reader, xanthic +, writes (28 July 2010):
 This may sound harsh, but if he really wanted to be in a relationship with you, he would be pursuing it. He's unsure of what he wants because in reality, he wants to keep his options open and keep you around as a back-up plan just in case. He's just not interested in you enough to be more than friends with benefits, otherwise he wouldn't have tried to have sex with you while still being unsure of what he really wants, other than a 'stress-free' life.
I think you'd be better off moving on to someone else and forgetting about any future with him. If he asks why you've become distant, tell him.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2010): It sounds like he's still wanting a relationship with you, but i would be careful in case he's just making sure you are still interested in him. I would still talk to him, but enjoy life :) hope that helped.
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