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What if my body turns him off? Should I wait until I’m more comfortable with my own body?

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Question - (8 September 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 9 September 2016)
A female Australia age 26-29, anonymous writes:

So I like this guy so much, he's very handsome and has asked me out on a date. I really enjoy being with him and things are advancing and all but i am really self aware of my shape, i have always struggled with my body , i am 5'1' and i weigh 136lbs

I'm really scared of what he will think of me and what if i turn him off ? I feel like i don't want him to touch me, or more specificly my problem areas like my stomach and thighs

Shall i go for it and take it to the next level or wait until i am comfortable with my own body ?

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A male reader, BrownWolf Canada +, writes (9 September 2016):

BrownWolf agony aunt

Real love is never based on what's on the outside.

Think of a relationship like a cake. A cake is not made with just flour alone. It take several other ingredients to make it delicious.

However, the most important thing in making a cake is....Time... for it bake:)

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (8 September 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI have body dysmorphia - which is a mental illness that makes my brain believe my "flaws" are worse and more noticeable than they are to others. It's a crippling daily thing and I never trusted anyone with my body (I'm overweight because of PCOS and eating disorders). Then I met my boyfriend online. I'd stayed on my profile that I'm not who they're after if they want slim, I told him in PM that I have a hormonal imbalance and that hair grows faster on me than many women, so I don't often have the mental energy to remove it.

My reason for telling you all that is that my boyfriend still loves me. There are great guys out there who will adore you whether you've shaved or not, are extra cuddly or not, etc. It's worth a shot :)

That said, save the nakedness until you feel ready. I've been with my boyfriend for 1½ years and I still have days where I stay completely clothed in front of him and change elsewhere because I can't bear to have him see me - even though he's seen me many times already. Take it slow and do what feels right for you :)

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (8 September 2016):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with Aunt honesty.

He CAN see your body, maybe not all the little things YOU don't like, but he isn't going to care.

Do you want to put your life on hold to get more comfortable? And how do you propose to fix this? Are you willing to miss out on life in the mean time?

Let me tell you a little secret... NO one is 100% happy with their body. That goes for dudes too.

Learn to love you as YOU are. Be you and love you.

And one date? Is not going to do you any harm. After all, you don't plan on getting naked on the first date are you?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (8 September 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntThe thing is sweetie, even though you wear clothes I am sure he can see what kind of figure you have, if he was turned off he never would have asked you out. Believe me when I say that everyone has problem areas, you will learn to love them as you get older. If you feel like you don't want him to see you yet, then wait until you are comfortable around him.

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