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What I found in his wallet floored me!!!!!

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 June 2009) 7 Answers - (Newest, 5 June 2009)
A male United States age 30-35, *eildo_08 writes:

this one is a toughy! So I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half! just last week I took out everything in his wallet while he was at work (it got all wet the previous day so I wanted to dry it all out) and found a............. sex offenders registration card! I was at a lost of words it was as if I pulled a snake out. I cried and cried. I know he didn't do it I know my boyfriend, he has 4 kids of his own and he is GAY. This happened about nine years ago (all his kids were already born) a friend of his eldest daughter came over to his place of residence (the girl was nine at the time and was sexually abused by her uncle) and she accused my bf of raping her.

They tried to get him for rape and were going to give him 50 years. Nothing was found there was no evidence he was a free man. Then they tried to get him for indecency with a child his word against hers. he lost of course and got 8 years probation and had to register! I know he didn't do anything. But why wouldn't you tell your boyfriend about this??? What should I do??

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009):

we have a resident faker in the house!

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A female reader, pebble United Kingdom +, writes (5 June 2009):

pebble agony auntThis is rubbish. It doesn't make any sense at all.

He knows the details yet, the boyfriend hasn't told him?

A sex offenders registration card? Really?

He didn't do it yet keeps it in his wallet like some kind of badge of honor?

Fake post, don't waste your time people.

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A female reader, kaylagal United States +, writes (5 June 2009):

kaylagal agony auntThis happened about nine years age after all his 4 kids were born, so I assume your bf is in his mid 30s plus. The little girl was 9yrs old, which makes her about 18-19yrs now, that about the same age as you. Wow, sounds like your boyfriend likes them young.

How do you know that girl was abused by a relative? Did you know her? Why would this girl at 9yrs old lie about your boyfriend?

Good luck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009):

Yeah, this isn't a real question.

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A female reader, RRR Australia +, writes (5 June 2009):

There are people out there that will falsely accuse someone of a horrible act. I have a gentle and kind friend who had a girl do that to him. It's a strange world.

Your boyfriend is probably a man who has never wanted to be involved in (or never thought he would be involved in) something so scandalous, frightening and shameful.

If he had told someone he cared about (you) and you judged or left him, it might shatter him, considering he is innocent. Do you think you can understand this? He might have been judged in the past!

Police are very crafty, and if they wanted to find somebody guilty of rape, they would. There would be DNA tests, the whole lot.

Just let him know you won't judge him. AND MEAN IT! You can't have a fight later on and say 'you don't tell me anything, like that time...' ect. He won't tell you anything after that!

My best friend is gay, and he would rather jump off a cliff than sleep with a woman. BUT they are two different people. The girl seems more mentally screwy than your boyfriend.

Good luck xxx

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009):

Wait I'm confused... you know all the gory details of your boyfriend's rape accusations, yet you claim he hid this from you? You also claim to be shocked to find a sex offender's registration card (which I'd like to point out DOES NOT EXIST ANYWHERE OTHER THAN HARRIS COUNTY TEXAS). Assuming the card is real, why would you be shocked to discover knowing the accusations your boyfriend went through and the fact that you admit HE HAD TO REGISTER?

Anyone else thinks this smacks of attention seeking bogus BS?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2009):

I'm confused about how much you knew before. Is the card the only surprise or is the whole story new to you?

The fact that he hasn't told you is, in my opinion, a big deal, yes. You have known him for long enough now. If you trust that he didn't do it, then well and good but why the secrecy? I'm going to be honest it's always difficult to think the 9 year old is lying and not the grown man who possibly raped her, so maybe the shame was too much for him.

Being gay and having 4 childen, he must have had to deal with a lot of deception/shame/secrecy etc etc so this could be a part of it.

Either way, bring it up with him and soon. Don;t get mad, just get the facts. If you have the teensiest intuition that he is guilty, rethink the relationship!

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