A
male
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anonymous
writes:I think I know the answer to this already but what does it mean when someone tells you that they are not in love with you but they love you very much??? At the same time they kiss you and hold your hand and do all the relationship stuff. Should moving on be an option here or no??? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, j'sgurl +, writes (31 August 2006):
Are you in a romantic relationship with this person. If you arent then just enjoy knowing that you have a great friend that loves you. If this is an intimate relationship please be very careful. Someone who says they love you but arent in love with you are using it as a cop out to maintain emotional distance. They obvoiously arent as emotionally invested in the relationship as the possibly could be. The relationship is obviously ok for them but not something that really 'floats their boat'if that makes sense. If you are ok with the status quo then stick with it. If you think that you may want more from a relationship in the future then do consider leaving.
A
female
reader, bonym  +, writes (30 August 2006):
 I will give you an example, I love my male best friend very much, but I am not in love with him, quite simply I dont have romantic feelings for him in any way shape or form, but I do have love for him, being in love constitutes romantic and sexual love along with friendshipl love, whereas just loving someone means no romantic feelings are involved. xXx
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A
female
reader, snowbird  +, writes (30 August 2006):
 Well I am not able to read her mind, but she is perhaps saying that whilst the relationship is not passionate enough to "rock her boat", she would not like to be without you in her life. This is completely normal, and as long as you are both happy I think it is a nice thing to say, and should not be seen as detrimental unless she has also said she "needs some space", or wants to move on..
I would ask her to clarify which she meant, but Im sure that she meant it as a positive statement, as you do say that everything else in the relationship is fine.
Maybe you could spring her a few nice surprises to keep the interest factor up, a nice meal out or trip to her favourite place, leave her little notes to show how you are thinking of her..nothing too expensive, just be thoughtful - she may be needing things to be a little less predictable, to keep the excitement up maybe?? ...Just a thought, but it never hurts, does it?!
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A
female
reader, kellyO +, writes (29 August 2006):
 I think she simply means that she doesnt have feelings for you in a "romantic" way so to speak but love u as a friend.
Well,it all depends on want u want in a relationship if love is part of it then i think moving on might be the best option.
Not everyone that has interest in you in an intimate way is in love with you. There are many relationship that isnt based on love but on other things like sex, companionship e.t.c. There is usually a mutual understanding between the parties involved. I'm not sure but perhaps she might be interested in this or maybe she is just simply playing you.
Perhaps the best think to do here before making a decision or jumping the gun will be to have a chat with her when next she initiates an intimate contact. Ask her why she does that if she isnt in love with you and get to know how response. I guess with that you will be able to decide whether to move on or not.
Take care dearie and all the best.
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