A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a relationship with this guy and we've been together for like almost 18 months. On his birth day I gave this friend (a girl) of mine his email address just to wish him happy bday(that was in April. Lately this friend of mine has been emailing him you know one of those pass on messages and I only gave her permission for that day(his bday). My boyfriend tells me when she emails him but this friend of mine doesn't. I don't know if i'm getting angry for nothing but I don't agree with that. Am I just overreacting? Oh and another thing when this friend of mine first met my boyfriend she was going on about how he is such a nice guy and is easy to talk to and she was just being forward but I thought maybe she was just excited and I tried to ignore that. What do you think I should do? I've only been friends with this friend for like 8 months(she was introduced to me by my best friend last year November).
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): You need to tell her that your permission was for only that day and that she needs to stop. If you are uncomfortable about it, then, she should understand becasue after all, he is YOUR boyfriend.
A
male
reader, atomickeg  +, writes (12 June 2007):
Simple Answer:You are overreacting. Complex Answer:You have trust issues with your boyfriend. Forwarding email messages is no big deal but it's making you upset because you have that little voice in the back of your head saying that its something more.Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar and a email of a monkey dancing or kid getting hit in the head with a basketball is just that. You have to ask if he has given a reason for you not to trust him. If the answer is no- you have to stop worrying about it. The minute that changes- it's a different story. I advise you to take a deep breath and calm down. Your partner will react positively to your calm and collect manner about the situation. I disagree with interrogating your friend about her feelings towards your boyfriend... If she does like him (which is a possibility) that doesn't mean that he's going to do anything with her. And plus how will that really help the situation? You can't block contact with him and other women. So the sooner that you say to yourself, "I trust him" the better off you will be. Best of luck :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): I'm concerned about your posessiveness over your boyfriend. Your friend needed "permission" to send an email to your lover? That's a little extreme. Is she really making advances at your boyfriend, sexually or relationship wise? If not, then it may just be a case of a friendly person.
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A
female
reader, Melanne  +, writes (12 June 2007):
 I can understand that you wanted to give your friend your boyfriends email and that you trusted your friend to write to him for only his birthday. You did a good thing and now this friend is abusing your trust.
I am glad that your boyfriend tells you when she writes that shows he cares about you and wants you to know that there is nothing going on, on his behalf.
You admit that you are not getting angry for nothing so this is a real issue to you. There seems to be a lot of questions, but you realise that these issues are real to you.
You haven't really known this friend long, but I would see if you can talk to her and ask her why she is sending these emails. Also talk to your boyfriend about this ask him if he likes her and if he has intentions to be with this girl. Tell him your fears. If he tells you that he likes you then you know you have nothing to fear and maybe this friend isn't such a friend that you thought?
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