A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:What can I do to make him pay more attention?I've been in a relationship thats coming upto 3 years!! My bf's completely changed, doesn't make an effort with me, doesn't make time for me but when I suggest we should break up he can't say no, but the problem is I just cant let him go unless he goes himself. He never listens to anything I say, his friends mean more than anything to him, he'll ditch me every weekend to go out with them! Im just sick of it I dont know what to do!! Its a misery! Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2009): Hey thankyou so much for your help everyone!!! Its much appreciated!! I'm going to dump him tonight, not had a chance to speak to him since he went out yesterday. I really don't have a choice but to leave him but atleast i'll be happy and stress free!!! xx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2009): In your heart you know what you have to do, you just need to get up the strength to do it. Right now you have been with this guy for three years. Your used to the couple status and are afraid of being alone. In reality you are alone. He obviously does not care anymore whether he says it or not actions speak louder than words. You are afraid of the pain of seperation but you are already feeling the pain and the longer you drag this out and stay with him the harder it will become. Now I don't know if you live with him, have a kid with him...etc. These things will obviously make things more complicated and you will need a proper plan of action, new place to live, child support... You should plan this out before you leave. If there are no strings attached just leave and be greatful you don't have any serious attachments. You won't even owe him and explaination, because in reality he won't care. The quicker you leave the sooner you can get over him and on to someone who will make you feel loved. It will take a while but it can't happen until you make the first move. On another note... I am sure you are thinking or have thought that he is the only one for you...Everyone has felt that way at one point of another but its just not true, life is not that simple. You will find someone better it just takes time, but for now concentrate on finding yourself. Sorry for the novel. Good Luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2009): Well, you are choosing to stay with him and be miserable. You say you can't leave him-why not??!! He doesn't deserve you and you don't deserve to be treated like that. There is nothing you can do to change him. Dump him!
...............................
A
female
reader, Lovely Sweet Laura  +, writes (4 December 2009):
 You can't make him do anything-if he wants to he will if he doesn't he won't. Leave, if he really cares he will want you back and be willing to change.Cheers!
...............................
A
female
reader, Niavax +, writes (4 December 2009):
Your boyfriend is suffering from what they call control freak syndrome, and does not seem to understand what the term 'respect' means. You I can understand, as I have recently just been in the same situation. I left him, he came back and now he has changed, he pays me more attention and we are happier for now and bonus. He does not go out so often with his friends although we sometimes get stuck for words. About you, find something to do for yourself that will occupy your time (anything that interests you) with time as he notices that you no longer care about him being out with his friends, the negative attention that you give him, by being depressed, in anguish and generally hurt in love/pain, find your self respect again and use it to your advantage. As soon as you change how you feel about yourself and him, the attention you give him won;'t be so negative and maybe you will get what you wish for. Light a white candle and mediate for peace of mind as emoptional turmoil is stressful. Pull yourslef away from the subject and start your own life afresh. That is the easiest way to start rebuilding a life for yourself, and if he seriously wants to join you he will change. Stay happy.
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (4 December 2009):
Just to say I agree entirely with Caring Guy.
This thing has run its course so dump him and move on.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (4 December 2009):
Dump him now. A boyfriend is supposed to love you, not ditch you when he can. You can either sit there with him and be miserable, or you can dump him. He won't change and he's not worth any more of your time. You've tried, he hasn't. Please don't waste time on someone who won't love you.
...............................
|
