A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 22 and have been occasionally sleeping with a man (my age) who I met in a club 18 months ago. We're both single and behave affectionately towards eachother when we're together but he rarely makes an effort to see me and I'm unsure how he feels. We live quite far apart and he's very busy studying but should I put myself on the line and tell him that I want more? I don't want to lose him completely. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (7 February 2008):
 I agree with Collaroy, that you are probably just a "friend with benefits" and he is likely just enjoying the sex above all. If you are enjoying that as well, and do not "want to lose him completely" as you indicate, then it IS what it is.
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (7 February 2008):
 Hi,
He's got a great friends with benefits deal going now with his busy life and everything.
After 18 months you are right to want to know if he really is interested on making more of a commitment. But be prepared, you might find that he doesn't want to go there.
In any event if he doesn't then you really had no future anyway, it will say a lot about his true character and you can move on with your life.
I'm sorry but I dont accept the "he's very busy studying" line, I went to University and never had so much free time in my life, thats a crock of an excuse if you ask me.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (7 February 2008):
 wen you say that you are sleeping together, does this mean you are dating or is it just a very casual thing? is it exclusive? if you want more from him, then just tell him that you would like to see more of him if he is comfortable with that. if you arent exclusive at the moment then suggest the 2 of you giving a relationship a try. as long as you dont come across too desperate or needy you should be fine!! your both old enough to get into a more serious relationship, also my guess is that if the guy didnt care for you, he wouldnt have stuck around for so long
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