A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Hey I'm 16 and I'm really really worried and scared. I'm a wax virgin in all areas and my boyfriend and I have decided that our next step is "oral" but I'm so scared because "down there" is really bad. I don't want to put him off but I'm really scared about it being waxed as Im told it hurts. How can I do anything to make it better so that I can still feel comfortable but not turn off my boyfriend? I want to take it all off, but I'm not sure how to go about doing it. I've tried shaving it but that just resulted in iching and I'm way too self consious to go and get it professtionally done. Any ideas? Thanks so much for the advice. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2006): Hi im about your age and I was in a similar situation not to long ago. If you are a little uncomfortable like i was even though the hair is normal, i suggest trimming it up, shaving some like u need to wear a bikini and shortening it a bit. You could have some itching so use a good razor and soap. If you would still like it done professionally just have it done, i mean they see that kind of stuff all the time u have nothing to worry about. Also u could talk to ur bf about what he likes, but really just do what is comfortable for you and will make u feel best. good luck
A
female
reader, xlittleredcutiex +, writes (6 July 2006):
Hiya.If you don't want a pro to do it, there are plenty products you can use yourself. I use veet rasera hair removal gel cream which moisturises your skin aswell, its really good.
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A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (6 July 2006):
 Its terrible that a 16 year old girl is she should be completely waxed before having oral sex! I'm sorry, but it is too much! The idea that you would 'turn him off' by not doing it is ... painful!
Waxing can HURT LIKE CRAP. Well, so my girlfriend tells me. Don't just do it because you think if you don't you 'won't turn him on'. You are his girlfriend, he should love you as you are.
I know that magazines, TV, the internet, and your friends are all probably saying 'you need to be waxed' (along with 'you need to be thin, you need to be 'hot', you need to have big tits etc). It's a hard thing to do, but you have to see all of that as 'noise'. Almost all of it is bullsh#t to be honest.
You are enough for your boyfriend as you are. He will be (he certainly should be) grateful to you for sharing your body with him, waxed or unwaxed. Really. Like Bev says, the most important thing is to just have a shower soon before!
If it really bothers you i suggest you just give yourself a small trim so everything is neat, and leave it at that. This is what a lot of women do (grown up women who do what they like, not what they think they should do). I suggest you try that and see how it goes. I'm sure your boyfriend will have a great time anyway ;) And if he has a problem with this, dump him as hard as you can, he's being an idiot.
If you have time read this article. It's about how porn creates unrealistic expectations for teenagers who are just starting to have sex. You might find it interesting...
http://www.newyorkmetro.com/nymetro/news/trends/n_9437/
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A
female
reader, sammie +, writes (5 July 2006):
 hya hunni well i think that if you think you will feel better with it all of then try to pluck up the courage and get it waxed it really isnt as bad as some people say i get mine done all the time and i think its better even if you dont get it all of they will make it look good and there is no need to be shy im sure they have seen worse alot worse its there job and thats what they get payed to do believe me they wont think nothink of it i used to do it for 2 years if you dont want to wax then i think the only other option is to shave ye it can get itchy but if you put some good cream of straight after then that sooths it quite abit and then when it starts to grow back shave again and it wont itch as much i think thats all i can suggest hope this helps hunni samx
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (5 July 2006):
 If "down there" is "really bad", then what you need is a shower, hon, not a wax!
If what you mean is that you grow hair on your mons, then rather than being "really bad", you're really very normal. Try to see it that way, instead of regarding it as somehow ugly or unnatural.
I hate to see young women getting all bent out of shape and worrying that they grow hair in places where it's actually OK to have hair! Don't panic because you have pubic hair. Waxing and shaving are a fad, that's all. When the fad passes, you'll find it was like celtic tattoos, electric-orange skirts, or hoop earrings. That is, something foisted on naive young women in the name of fashion.
If your pubic hair looks untidy to you, give it a trim, by all means. Keeping it short is a good compromise.
But shaving or waxing all of it just perpetuates a weird fad, and one that sets up unrealistic expectations for your boyfriend. Women have pubic hair, and he probably should become acquainted with that idea.
As long as you're clean and tidy, he shouldn't have any other complaints. The choice is his and if he won't perform oral because you're not as hairless as a child, then he's just looking for excuses.
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