A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was dating a guy for 2 months on a regular basisand he kept persuing me for more dates and everything was going great. He invited me to meet his parents, I hung out with his friends but we both never really spoke about what we wanted we just went with the flow and I didnt think it mattered if things were going well...Then a few weeks went by and I asked him if he wanted to do something on the weekend. He said he may be going away but if he doesnt we can do something and asked what I wanted to do.. all weekend went by and I never heard from him so I messaged him on monday and he said he went up north snowboarding.i said thats fun but it would have been thoughtful if you messaged me to tell me you were actually going away and he never responded.I called him and he never called me back and a few weeks went by and we didnt talk.I saw him at a bar after not talking for 3 weeks and everything was great and we left together and then I never heard from him a few days later so I texted him asking him where he stood with things as it was really nice to see him.He said it seemed like I was looking for more of a relationship and he doesnt think he could offer me that right now. I said I dont know what I want but I know I want thinks to be consistent... It just seemed weird because the whole time he seemed like he wanted a relationship too but then just changed his mind..ended up seeing him at another bar a week after that conversation and we left together again and he was telling me how he wants to go on vacation with me and how he loves being with me and im so beautiful.Woke up and he cabbed home to drop me off and its been 2 weeks and we havnt spoken since.Why would he be acting like this?
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male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (4 March 2011):
 Well he still doesn't want a relationship, that much seems obvious... You've just been randomly seeing each other in bars by pure coincidence, had a pleasant enough interaction and it seems to always be followed by a few weeks of no contact.
He's saying one thing, then doing another... sorry, but actions trump words every time and right now his actions aren't backing up anything he's saying. I'd move on as it sounds like you're both looking for different things right now.
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