A
male
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*elboy1681
writes:I need help, I'm stuck between the devil and the deep blue sea because I am in the course of getting refered for bipolar disorder and one of the problems it causes with me is mood swings which cause me to go into a verbal rage i'm never violent, and on the 22nd of febuary I had an episode in front of my fiancé, I new it was coming but I didn't know how to stop it so after I left my fiancé's house I was arrested because she obviously called the police and I was charged with domestic breach of the peace and given a 6 month good behaviour bond. I wasn't told by the courts to stay away from her or our 2 little boys but I haven't spoken to her since this happened and I just love her so much, i'm getting help for my problems but as formy fiancé and children it's like I'm going through a living bereavement, I want to contact her but I'm scared incase the of the consequeces that may screw up my good behaviour bond I just want her to know that I'm sorry and ghat I love her and can we try again, I have a solicitor and he sent her a letter but when I saw the letter it isn't what I wanted her to read at all I wanted something that came straight from the heart but how do you tell a solicitor here is what I want sent so I have composed a short letter that could be sent by mail, email or text to her but I'm not sure if I should send it, My Dearest Donna,I'm not writting to you to harrass or to cause any trouble, I just want to hear about callum and cameron Donna I'm so sorry for making you feel the way you did and for my actions but I'm getting help, by means of a counsellor and through the GP, because I don't ever want you to have to go through or be scared and frightened of me ever again I want you to feel safe and secure around me and please know that I will love you til the end of time so let's not throw what we had away, let's sort out our problems properly and start a fresh, take our time and be a family once again, so please don't give up on us.I love you Donna and if you can only love me in my dreams let me sleep forever.Love you until the end of time DerekxxxxI just want her to know I'm there and I love her with all of my heart. What should I do?
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female
reader, kayla20 +, writes (14 March 2010):
 id say contact the courts and ask if you would breach your conditions if you were to send her a letter rather than going ahead behind the courts backs.if it is ok by the courts then id say send the letter admit that your actions were wrong tell her how you are getting help and ask for forgiveness also id suggest getting flowers sent to her and something for the children so they dont forget about you.im sympathise with your situation but you have to accept that your fiance is scared and is probably abit sceptical about whether or not to give you another chance incase the same thing happens again also you have your children to consider in this also good luck
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (14 March 2010):
Yes send it. You weren't told to stay away, so send it and try to speak to her again. Remember though, if she gives you a second chance, not to lose it again. Or you will lose her and the kids.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 March 2010): Hi Derek
I come from a family with several members who have Bi Polar disorder and I have worked alongside Mental Health Services for many years. You need to understand the condition. Look for BiPolar websites on the net and inform yourself about this illness. You need a good Psychiatrist. It's about getting the right mood stabiliser(s) to assist keeping your mood in reasonable balance. It can take some time for you and your Psychiatrist to find the correct type and range of medication but this can be done. When you have found some quality information on the web about your illness I suggest you copy it to your partner, telling her that you are also working with a Psychiatrist to get the correct level of mood stabiliser. You must always take your medication, missing it for a few days can open up a window of opportunity for the illness to reassert itself. You must also significantly limit alcohol and never use street drugs. Join a Bi Polar disorder group, you will get good support and information there. If your job is quite strssful, try and find another one that enables you to work at a reasonably comfortable pace. If you do these things you stand a good chance of getting cntrol back and hopefully your family. There is a lot of research going on globally into this illness, hopefully a much improved way of managing this illness will emerge soon. Best of luck.
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