A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:HiI split up with my boyfriend a couple of days ago after many years together because the fun in our relationship has gone (for me anyway) and i cant see myself being happy with him in the the long run like i did once before. He collected all his belongings last night and all we did was cry about the break up. We are both really cut up about it and love each other. But we just stopped getting on once he had moved in with me and my parents. One minute i know ive done the right thing and the next minute im crying because i desperately want to be with him, Do you think ive done the wrong thing or am i just finding it hard to adjust to change? I dont miss our relationship but i miss him being around. Sometimes i feel i put up with our relationship beacuse i cant be bothered to start again with anyone, i think i stayed with him because i was 'comfortable' with him? Im just so confused, I just want this hurt to go away!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (18 July 2008):
Well of course you are going to miss him. If you were that close to a brother or sister and they moved out then you would cry and miss them too. It doesn't mean you want to share a room with them forever.
If he was your first serious relationship then of course you are going to have feelings of "what if no one ever loves me like that again?" and fears that you are going to be a lonely mad cat lady and die alone.
However, this doesn't make it true. It's easy to stay with someone because you are such good friends and it works and it's there. But you have to take a chance that there is something better out there, something like true love. Something like they show in the films. Maybe it doesn't exist like that for everyone but you can't just stick with the first person you found simply because you don't think there is anything better out there.
As soon as you meet someone new and feel weak in the knees when he kisses you then you will know you have done the right thing.
Good Luck!! xx
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