New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244974 questions, 1084345 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

Should we wait until we have sex for the first time to try anything or should we find out our likes/dislikes now?

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (3 October 2012) 6 Answers - (Newest, 4 October 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I'm 17 and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. Our school did a sex ed talk with our form yesterday and we answered loads of questions and talked about stuff as a class. I found it really interesting. I discovered lots of things about my boyfriend after that. I never doubted him being irresponsible but when we got asked questions individually, I heard what he was asked.

Do you have a girlfriend? Yes.

Are you in a caring relationship? Yes.

Have you had sex together yet? No.

Have you considered sex together? We've talked about it.

Would you like children someday? Yes, I would. Not right now though!

If your girlfriend was to become pregnant now, what would you do? Whatever she wants me to do. I'd go out and get a job and juggle school to support my child and give it the best future it could have.

He's a lot more responsible than I thought. We went to my house that day after school and talked about it, and what we would do if I were to become pregnant. We discussed sex and our future and where we saw ourselves in a year etc. we discussed when we would be ready to have sex, and we agreed when we were both eighteen in decenber provided we are both ready. That night, we undresses in front of each other and felt each other. We kissed and did some oral sex to get to know each other. We want to know what feels good for each other before we make love. We then slept together. Not sex, just sleeping.

Are we doing this right? Or should we just wait until we have sex for the first time to do anything? Thanks.

View related questions: oral sex

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Share

Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2012):

The way I have worded my question makes me sound very dim, sorry!

My boyfriend would go along with whatever I want, however, I am on the pill due to heavy, painful periods and we will use a condom. I am not one to believe in abortion unless the child would have a serious deformity or disablement which would reduce their life quality and cause them suffering, or the child was conceived through rape. If I were to fall pregnant and I didn't feel I could cope, then we would give the child up for adoption, as there are many couples out there that can't have children.

I am comfortable and so is he. We are both virgins so we thought we should take some time before we have intercourse as we both know sex isn't all about penetration.

We both respect each other deeply and have discussed what we would do if I were to fall pregnant etc

Thank you for your help!

<-- Rate this answer

A female reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2012):

I think it's a brilliant idea to get close to each other and try other sexual things before going all the way. This is what me and my boyfriend are doing (I'm a virgin, he's not). I used to be terrified of sex for the first time but because we've experimented before and I know how things work and that he'll make sure I'm ok, I'm not worried about it anymore. It's definitely a good idea to get some experience with each other first.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (4 October 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntare you doing this right? if you both felt comfortable then YES you are doing it right.

BTW what would your BF do if you wanted an abortion?

are you on birth control yet? you should be especially if you are getting sexual now and planning intercourse in December.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, BondGirl72 United States +, writes (4 October 2012):

BondGirl72 agony auntI think you should only have sex when you're both ready, not because you've had a talk at school and decide to experiment because of it. Just because others have sex at your age, does not mean that you have to. Don't go any further than what you are really comfortable with, there is no set age or time for when you are supposed to have sex, so do it on your own schedule.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (3 October 2012):

aunt honesty agony auntAs long as you both feel comfortable exploring each others bodies and having sexual contact then you are not doing anything wrong at all. Sometimes it is better to build a sexual relationship gradually so you are both on the right track, as long as you both enjoy doing this. It is good to hear that you are two young sensible people and you are taking your time and not rushing in to anything.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

A female reader, Stayc63088 United States +, writes (3 October 2012):

Stayc63088 agony auntHe sounds like a responsible and caring boyfriend, and it seems like you two have a mature and understanding relationship, congratulations! I think it is natural to try somethings before having sex for the first time. You kind of build up to it if you will. You learn a lot about each other and bond closer before the actual act, plus it makes sex the first time easier. You know each other's bodies better and feel more comfortable. It's all up to each individual couple and what they feel is right. You seem to be doing everything that feels right for the both of you.

<-- Rate this answer

...............................   

Add your answer to the question "Should we wait until we have sex for the first time to try anything or should we find out our likes/dislikes now?"

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0156504000042332!