A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey,am wondering if you could help me please.A few months ago, I was with a girl for all of 8 hours before she told me she wasn't sure if it was what she wanted. nothing more than a kiss ever happened, and that was the end of it. Tried to be friends with her but that didn't exactly work out.The next part in the story is we're both involved in a sports club, ie running it. Being adults and all we should be fine getting alone in a professional capacity.Over the last few weeks ive met an amazing girl, and asked her if we could be more than friends last weekend, and much to my suprise she said that would be great.But heres my problem... its so early in our relationship, and i'm not sure if i should mention my previous liason (yes they know eachother, but aren't particularly close from what i can tell) now or leave it a bit. I don't want my gf to find out in 6 months time that we were together for a tiny bit and not like the fact that we would have been working together on this sports club since. But at the same time i just want to enjoy getting to know her and not get bogged down in talking about exs after only a couple of weeks of being with her!please help me dudes... thanks... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, LauraE +, writes (2 July 2007):
It would be difficult to mention it without it sounding like a big deal wouldn’t it? A relationship of a few weeks is one thing, but an 8 hour one-kisser can be safely ignored. Why would she find out anyway? Not telling her isn’t the same as telling lies - you don’t tell a girlfriend every detail about all your old relationships unless you are a bit of a saddo. If your new relationship lasts, she will hopefully see you at the sports club, and will know that this other woman is just a colleague. If in the future some “friend” was to stir up trouble, you only have to tell her the truth. – It was a total non-event, which it didn’t even occur to you to mention. Unless she’s very paranoid, she won’t bat an eyelid.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2007): I think you should tell her. You can't start a relationship with lies. However, when you tell her, try not to make a big deal about it because f she thinks you're bothered then she will be too.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (2 July 2007):
 You should never mention any previous affair. Why? If she asks, well, then do. But, otherwise, why do you want to upset her?
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