A
male
age
36-40,
*hristoph
writes:I have been friend with this girl during and after school, for going on 7 years now. I have seen her with different boyfriends and i have had feelings for her in the past but ignored them since we were friends and also she was in a relationship. But recently i have had these feelings return and she is still in a relationship with a guy who i think is just using her for what she has. They have moved out together and he held down 2 jobs but then he started playing a online cgame called World of Warcraft, and admittedly yes i play it to and so does she, but the game began to take over his life and he quit both his jobs and forced her to be the only one to bring money into their lives. She is doing a traineeship so the money isnt that great, but he told her she had to get a loan so he could get a newer computer. So she did, and her dad has paid it off for her because 'he felt like it' which i have no worries with.Now all he does is sit at home and play on his computer and sleep and smoke excessive amounts of weed, he hardly leaves the house like her birthday this weekend she is going to dinner with her family and she has invited some friend to it...he isnt going...its her 21st birthday and he is going to stay at home, he even let one of their 2 rabbits die on a hot day because he was too lazy to move the cage so he left it all covered in the sun and killed one while she was at work.And now i fear that his criminal past has made an influence on her and she is now stealing money from her work. and i mean she is STEALING money not some here and there, she grabs 50 dollar notes and she has a coin purse almost always full of $2 coins...she never used to be like this.She has called me up may times asking me to take her to her mums house because they were fighting and he has told her to get out, and the one that almost had me going to their place and killing him was when she called me saying she was hiding under their house and she was crying and scared and he told her she better leave before he does something to her he will regret later on...and she seeems to think that he is putting away money for a wedding ring...i honestly think he is just waiting so he can buy something for himself...I cant help but feel like i am also her taxi, because he lost his license (apparently a reason he cant get a job, even though she walks to work everyday) and he wants her to get another loan to pay off his fines totaling over $1500, and also to get them a car, but neither can drive it she doesnt have a license and new laws mean she would have to have someone teach her for about 1 year maybe 2 at her rate, and since she has moved out she cant get her mum and dad to do it, so since neither of them have a car i am always being called up and asked to drive her to the supermarket to do the shopping (which he doesnt come to he stays at home) or drive from my house at night to drive them around town for hours so they can see people they dont know to try and get more weed, and i just feel more and more that i am being used for what i have not because i am her friend.Lately she has been getting more and more aggitated when im speaking to her as well, being very blunt or critizing everything i do or say...So now to the question lol:How do i tell her im sick of being her taxi and putting up with an abusive boyfriend who doesnt care about anything, and that i have feelings for her or should i just tell her i cant be her friend if she is going to continue like this, which is something i have considered recently as well...im just so unsure what to do...(i hope this wasnt too long, its my first time here)
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at work, money, moved out, wedding, world of warcraft Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Christoph +, writes (16 November 2007):
Christoph is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell an update...a lot has happened in the 12 hours actually since i wrote this question...a lot..ive been havin a bad few days as u know, and today she went me a msg that said: Boo OMG *his name* is bein weird about you again lol he is a funny manand i just lost it basically, ive had enough so to which i replied: Pfft i dont care im over him having issues with me for no reason. All i seem to do is help you guys and drive you around if he doesn't like it then fineI know i shouldnt have but well once i pressed send it was too late...i got this back a few minutes ago:Sounds like u do. U sound all whiney. Y whine at me i dont give a f**k wat he says but u know if ur driving me round. I thought you were my friend jeezso basically i have estranged another friend possible/mostly because of me but i cant shake the feeling that he has been planning for this and is gunna be happy im out of the picture...Do i go to dinner with her and everything in 3 days for her birthday? i dont feel i should...
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