A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a guy mate who I get on with and try to see on a regular basis. He already has a girlfriend, but lives away from him and I'm 23 and still single. Every time Mum knows that I arrange to meet up with him, she complains that I am 'wasting my time' and that I should focus more on finding myself a potential rather than just hanging out with guys for friendship as I am getting 'old'. Me and this guy mate are just friends and won't develop into anything further but we enjoy each other's company... should I 'dump' this male friend and start looking and spending time with potentials or continue this friendship whilst searching for potentials? Please help.
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (17 March 2009):
 23 is not too old, I think your mum may just have some old-fashioned values. Dont stop being friends with this guy just because your mum wants you to meet someone, in fact this guy could probably introduce you to more sutiable men than you could find on your own!
I always believe that once you stop looking for a boyfriend then one will come along, right when you lease expect it. You cannot rush finding the perfect guy, and in the long run it is better for you to stay single now than jump into a marriage or relationship with someone that is really unsuitable, all because of pressure from your family.
I hope this helps!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2009): to be honest it is none of your mums business! if you both enjoy eachothers company then so be it and ok he has a girlfriend but that doesn't mean they'll be together forever and trust me your not too old! i am 20 and still single! i got a few mates who are guys and majority i used to like them or they liked me but nothing happend but i still hang out with them because sometimes it's nice to relax with a guy whom you know well.
Carry on doing that it's nice to talk with guys understand them more and if something happens it happens if not you still got friendship your mum needs to butt out of your life to be honest and focus on her own.
don't give up the friendship sometimes being friends is alot better than being together in a realtionship :)
hope it helps.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (17 March 2009):
Jesus is your mum THAT desperate to marry you off? Offer to move out if it's bothering her that much. Or suggest she tries being a foster carer if she is that desperate for a baby to cuddle. Or she could get a job volunteering in a maternity unit. She sounds nuts! You might want to figure out what she wants and buy her a puppy or something.
I see absolutely NO harm in having make friends. This is your mum's problem not yours. Point out that he has lots of hot single friends who might be there and you are networking.
I love my male friends to bits, and I am married, in fact I met my husband through my friend John and he was our Best Man.
You should not be out looking for "potential" boyfriends if you do not want a boyfriend. You are 23 and just a kid. You should be out seeing the world and having lots of fun, not trying to marry the first guy that comes along.
Work on your career and building up a group of best friends.
It's not 1943 any more!!!!!!! Women are allowed to be more than just baby making washing up machines.
Good Luck!! xx
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