A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:me and my cousin haven't seen each other since we where really lil kids finally we meet again after 17 years i feel strongly connected to her.we play around bit wrestling tickling etc. i cant keep my eyes off from her.i do like her allot. i don't know if this is like normal behavior cause she is my cousin and are kinda alike.or maybe its just because we like each other.and if so we do love each other our family is way old fashion. they def will not approve, and more likely will they ban us from the family.would it be wise to love then ? or just to ignore and hope the feelings go away.
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male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (15 August 2007):
 Does your cousin tell you that she returns your feelings? If no, then it's like any other relationship. You are the only one "in love" and you will need to move on to other relationships.
If she does return your feelings then understand all of the baggage that goes along with this relationship. There will be immense pressure from certain family members to break up. This kind of relationship is less socially tolerated than a gay relationship. You and your cousin would have to rise above the whispers of disapproval that will pervade your world for as long as you are together.
If you are first cousins then it is very risky to have children since these kids would be the product of in-breeding and could likely suffer from birth and/or genetic defects.
These are just a few of the consequences of going out with your cousin. Good luck and take care.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007):
Its not something you choose to do but if you cant help your self then its a case of you cant help who you fall in love with.. you need to sit down and think further ahead, Im in the exact same position at the moment and we've both decided its what we want but are very slowly building it up as we cant be apart, its a case of being prepeared for what people think and at the end of the day your family would not turn there back on you, if they did, theres something wrong with them, what wrong with been happy. if your not hurting anyone and its not illegal, so what! if it was wrong it would be illegal, surely!
Its just this generation that frown upon it as only 80 years ago families would be happy for cousins to marry because they knew what you were getting, thats how it was...
20% of the worlds population are cousins married...
Winston Churchill, Einstein, Abraham Lincoln all married there cousins and many many more famouus people did...
it used to be the norm...
All asains have arranged marriages with there cousins as we all used to have in times of old its just this bloody generation, probably cos of tv and papers that influence how people think...
I started by mutually agreeing to tell some close friends and all of them have been totally fine with it somehow, my aunties and her brother now know n the past two weeks and noone as said anything to stop us fort some reason, probably cos we're older and sensible people and get on and look fab together that they just accept it...
BUT our parents have an idea as we hang around together a LOT but they do not say anything ecept "hows Jane" and I dont know what will happen if we did tell them...
we've decided that if we do tell, we'll have to stick strong with it and battle through it then hopefully come out of the other side...
AND we decided one thing, we're not hurting anyone, its not illegal, were good for each other as were keeping fit, eating well, teaching each other fab things like teaching her guitar so her dads pleased (but stll doesnt really know, but must have an incling) and finaly, ITS NOONE ELSES DAMM BUSINESS, as long as your happy...
all the best...
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A
male
reader, [email address blocked] +, writes (2 August 2007):
i'm going to stay it's right to love your family but not wanting to date your cousin because i fell in love with my 2nd cousin when i first saw her u just got to get over it.and man it's wrong to dat family
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2007): Well, I don't know about in the USA, but here in Britain it's not illegal.
My cousin & I have been together for 7 years now, and it's been fun all the way.
Phil
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (1 August 2007):
 You are just infactuated. I had a huge crush on one of my cousins when I was 14. It's not something you should pursue though. Just keep your eyes open, there are plenty of great gals out there that aren't related to you.
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (1 August 2007):
 You'll have to decide if your family is more important than your feelings for her. If she's a close cousin, it's not legal anyway, so stick with your family. If she's a distant cousin, decide if you can handle the ostracism. It may only be the thrill of the forbidden that's pushing the two of you on, so be very careful.
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