A
female
age
36-40,
*acy
writes:I really need help to decide. I have a daughter to my partner of 8 years and we have lived together happily for over 7 years. He is relaible, dependable and everything a girl should need but there is no spark there no more. I have found myself looking at other guys in a sexual way and think this is telling me my realtionship is over. I enjoy the company of my partner and the freindship but i feel i am missing the excitment that i need. I feel my partner would get along in some ways better without me as i probably restrict what he does by being with him. Please help!!
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female
reader, Rymo +, writes (1 August 2007):
well you dont really need any help really do you, you have figured it out already.yes as much as people dont like to admit it Relationships run a course, like a river that finally finds the sea. It’s not sad, only natural.Passion and lust fades, love and respect doesn’t have to – but it will if you over stay your welcome. So many people just stay together waiting for a WAR to break them up. Which then often destroys people for a while and leaves them bitter.If you feel a bit down then lets face it, he probably does too. Forget your daughter – too many kids end up all screwed up because the parents felt they could break up because of them. Just speak to your man, drop whatever act there may be and be honest. Don’t lure him into an argument to have the conversation or wait till he’s weak or any of that rubbish. You love him, he loves you – keep it that way. Remember and be happy for the journey you took and thank each other for your daughter – she will always be both of yours, YOU MADE HER!But come on, your river has reached the sea. It’s not sad, just a new beginning! Unlike whatever modern day principles say, people weren’t meant to spend their entire lives together – how do I know this, simple it makes us unhappy!Be happy! Follow your heart, it’s the only voice you should ever trust - it can’t lie to you and you can’t ignore it, so don’t try.xx
A
female
reader, ohdear16  +, writes (1 August 2007):
 You need to sit your partner down and explain to him what you are feeling, if he really cares about you he will understand. If there are no sparks for you there's a chance there is none for him, but he doesn't want to say anything. You need to be honest with him, and in the end you may stay being the best friends you were meant to be, and you will be free to explore other guys, and he will be free to do whatever he feels he needs to. I hope this helps---Stephanie---
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (1 August 2007):
 Ugh! The seven-year itch! I've had it. It's horrible. On the one hand, you hate to leave a perfectly good, stable, relationship - on the other hand when things grow stale it's like the kiss of death. I married at 19, and knew within 4 years that I was bored to death but I couldn't bring myself to leave the relationship because I hated the idea of being alone, and I thought I could end up in a worse situation, like with someone who has substance issues, abusive, or cheats on me. There are no easy answers here. Think about ways you can spice up your current relationship if possible. I think we are all guilty of wanting to keep things exciting but I'm really not sure it's possible. Eventually the new relationship you fall in love with, will also grow old if you stay together long enough. I don't know how our mothers and grandmothers did it -- staying married to the same man for 50 years. I'd go nuts!
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