A
female
age
30-35,
*acer_chick89
writes:i posted this on yahoo, so the 3 bottom paragraphs are in response to questions. that is why they are phrased strangely. they are pertinent info though so i left themWent home for my cousins wedding, met a boy, hung out with boy, liked boy, boy liked me, boy kissed me, boy asked me out, messed around (no comments on morals plz), hung out, he said that he wanted to ask me out again, when he has his life straightened out a little more, and doesn't have 3-6 months of jail time hanging over his head. he said this would be around a week. he said that he didn't want me to have a boyfriend that isn't there. but he lives about 2 hours away, and i am a broke college student. I like him very much, and we have a lot of chemistry, but i am also interested in someone else that i go to school with, and i am thinking that he likes me as well. They are completely different, but both seem to have high boyfriend potential. D is the bad boy type, but is a family oriented dude, and has a huge heart. there is a lot of physical attraction as well as personality compatability, which is nice.The other guy, J, is the smart anime geek that is cute, and very sweet and funny. I have been interested in him for a month or so now, and i think that he may be interested too... i am also interested in going out with him, but i know that, if D asks me out again, and i say yes, J will probably be hurt by it... and i probably woudn't be single for a while, if i say yes... So there is the very very condensed version. Any questions, let me know. Any advice is appreciated... I just don't know what to do about this whole situation. I kind of said i would go out with D, but i don't know if i should. i just want some decent advice...Eh heh... D isn't a "jail bird" specifically. I'm not stupid, and i know the difference. he has BEEN fixing his life (prior to meeting me). He hasn't done anything wrong since about May or June. He is trying to reform himself, which i find respectable. he is someone that i used to know when i lived at my moms, then i moved, and lost contact, re-met him about three months ago, then ran into again this past weekend, and ended up going out, "taking a break", and kind of telling him that i would go out with him again when the other things are taken care of... i know that if you don't know someone, you can't get a good picture of them, and he looks particularily bad, but he is a very nice guy, and i know several of his friends and that is what they think too...Ok... i know this looks bad, but he has been clean since he did it, and he only did it because he was doing some dirty drugs (like i said, got clean!) He broke into his school with a couple other guys and caused about a qtr mill in damages... i know that it looks absolutely horrible on his part, but that is what happened, and now he is clean, and, like i said, he is straightening out his life now... so yeah...And he's not in jail, he is on probation for the school thing. He just has to pay some fines that he isn't sure if he can pay. He said that he didn't want to be going out with me if he ends up going back, which i (personally) think was considerate. He could have just continued to go out with me, but he said that he didn't want me to be with him if he gets sent back because that would technically mean that i cheated on him if i were to go out with someone else in the next 3-6 months...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Hopeful Romantic  +, writes (8 October 2008):
 I have dated many bad boys and have learned many lessons from doing so. You can't turn a bad boy into a good boy - it just doesn't happen. I recommend going after the good boy. Not only will you have much more fun w/ the good guy, but your life will be way less stressful and you'll be happy consistently rather than always being upset with the bad boy and his ways.
Please believe me when I tell you that dating guys w/ legal issues is never good ... I've been w/ 3 guys in the past who had legal issues & none of those relationships ended up being good. They were always in trouble, and it seemed like they would never get off of probation & the law was never going to stop watching them.
I realize it is real easy to fall in love w/ the bad boys, but it just isn't worth it! Please believe me! I hope it works out w/ the good guy.
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