A
male
age
,
*jmarke
writes:I was in a ltr for 7 years and she left for no apparent reasonA month later I met (again) a woman I had a crush on when we were teens. we started dating and neither of us were looking for anything it just happened. now a month later we are very much in love and she is a cancer survivor and has been alone for almost 3 years before we met that special night. Due to her cancer and such she has never been engaged and she can't have children due to radiation treatments. when she told me she loved me I was amazed that she said it because she is one of them woman that has to know absolutely for sure before she says them words. I said well now we can get married (jokingly)and she said yeah and my step dad can do the ceremony. SO my question is... should I buy her an engagement ring for christmas? By the way I am 45 and she is 43. Thank you, Mark
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female
reader, Teacake +, writes (20 November 2008):
 YOu might want to ask a little more to see if she is actually interested in marriage before you do something that serious. If you aren't on the same page 100% and haven't actually talked about that, it would put her on the spot and you could feel very taken aback.
Naturally its up to you. But have a chat before you go shopping. If she seems interested you might find a jewelery store while going out shopping and perhaps ask in a humorous way if she would like to pick out a ring?
I have no idea how any of that goes!LOL Good luck!
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (20 November 2008):
WAY TOO FAST!!
She's survived cancer so she may want to live for the day, but take her on holiday, do something special and magical.
Don;t tie yourself into a legal contract, you have so much time for that.
Give her a memory rather than a moral dilemma.
Good Luck!! xx
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