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She wants me to stick my finger in her and I need female advice on how to do it!

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 November 2008) 10 Answers - (Newest, 6 December 2010)
A male Canada age 41-50, anonymous writes:

My gf recently shoved a finger up her anus as she approached her climax. Now she'd like me to do it and I'm embarrassed to say I'm not too sure what to do. I blushed when she asked me and we didn't talk about it. I wouldn't want a finger up my anus. Doesn't it hurt? How can I best go about this? I want her to feel good. What is it about it that does feel good and how do I make sure I do that? I can't tell if she's doing anything with her finger when it's in there. Any female insights would be appreciated.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2010):

It is difficult for a person, especially a girl, to pleasure themselves by putting a finger up their bottom during intercourse. It is better done by the partner but ideally, an anal dildo of the right shape and texture will do better although it is not so personal.

Use plenty of lubrication and be gentle, very gentle. A slow in and out movement is the best with maybe a wiggle at the point of orgasm.

As a bloke, I think we should never refuse to put a finger or other up a girlfriend's bottom. Girls have a difficult enough time achieving an orgasm at times so if a finger up bum helps, then do it. She will tell you what she likes but you can experiment a little. You might try a role play where you are the doctor and you have to take her temperature in her bottom. Use a rectal thermometer, lubricated and inserted very gently and slowly without jabbing it into the side. Once you have inserted it about two inches or so, no further, try wiggling it about from side to side and pushing it in and out a little. See how she likes this. You can progress to something larger but pleasure comes from the stroking against the sides of the anal canal as the anal canal is richly supplied with nerves and extends into the body about two and a half inches. There are two sphincter muscles, one on the outside that can be felt at the opening of her bottom and the other is at the inside end of her anal canal. Something nice pushed up until it just passes the internal sphincter will, or possibly could, send her into orbit with delight.

Remember to be very very careful and gentle. A moment's stupidity could cause damage for a lifetime and even death in an extreme case.

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A male reader, funkykev100 Canada +, writes (1 December 2009):

it's easy.

trim your finger nails short.

try girl on top position, reach your hand behind her,and dip those love juice little by little and apply on to her ass.

insert your finger slowly until love juice can fully lubricate her rectum. then starts fingering and pumping at the same time.

wait for her climax....

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2009):

Ok I had a boyfriend that used to love to do this to me....and it is the only thing that tips me over the edge into an orgasm. Make sure its lubricated and the first time just put the tip in. Tell her that she has to tell you how she wants it such as ....oh deeper, faster etc. Gentle in out mothions in time to sex works for me.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2009):

The anus is very sensitive and very pleasurable to many people. I think you are lucky to have a g/f who likes a finger up her bottom. I can understand your reluctance although to me it would be sheer joy to be asked!

Perhaps you could insert a small anal dildo instead of your finger or better still, put on one of those thin plastic gloves found in hair tinting kits. They fit tightly and should be well lubricated. Be very gentle and smear lubrication round her anus then push the tip of your finger inside her and then withdraw it and push it back in again. This will give her pleasure as you slowly push it all the way up inside her.

Good luck, I wish a girl would ask me to put my finger up her bottom. I guarantee it would feel nice for her.

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A male reader, Hoop_dhobi United Kingdom +, writes (7 November 2008):

If you don't like the idea of it, just do it the once- with a torn fingernail. She won't ask again.

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (5 November 2008):

DoubleM agony auntWith little reservation, I must agree with "qcumbr1" that a bit of anal massage during a bj results in an incredible orgasm for the man. Physiologically, this is stimulation of the prostate gland and results in a greater release of sperm. Personally, the experience was strange the first time (about 35 years ago) with a girlfriend who was very oral and craved cum, but I quickly adapted (LOL). Perhaps some women also also enjoy anal stimulation for a different reason.

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A female reader, Cherriepie United States +, writes (5 November 2008):

Cherriepie agony auntAren't you a little too old to ask advice of this sort? Don't you ever watch Cinemax after midnight?

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (4 November 2008):

eyeswideopen agony auntIt might rather difficult for you, you know, kind of like patting the top of your head while rubbing your tummy sort of thing.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008):

Almost forgot - get some medical examination gloves and K-Y jelly just in case. Contrary to popular belief, a woman's shit does NOT smell like roses and you don't want any of that under your fingernails.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008):

How in hell do you reach it? Do you have to have your arm broken in three places and dislocate your wrist?

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