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age
41-50,
*
writes: Hi, I met a girl about a month ago. She is almost everything I could want in a woman and we spend alot of time talking things over about how drawn we both are to each other. She had only been apart from her ex' of 4 years for a couple of months and was 'over him' etc. Anyway, to try and keep this brief; very suddenly she stops calling, takes a day to reply to text messages/emails and so on. Eventually I talk to her and she explains that her ex' has been in touch and wants to talk things over with her. I told her that I understood and if all I could do to make her happy was to leave her alone to be with her ex' then I would do it. She quickly explained that she had very strong feelings for me and that she just needed some 'space' to sort things out with her 'ex. She said that she would call me 'next week'. 'Next week' was this week just gone and I've heard nothing. Sure, I can see that the obvious answer is that she has got back with her ex'. But....why not just tell me so I can move on.....especially if her feelings for me are as she said they were? Anyway if anyone out there can help me make some sense out of this one - feel free!
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female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (28 July 2007):
 Humans are extremely chicken when it comes to confontation. Shes back with her ex but avoidance is easier than telling you that.
In my opinion, you wouldnt be 'over' an ex of 4 years in a couple of months even if it was her decision to go. Even if someone no longer loves someone. A long term relationship can take many months to move on from.
Sounds like she thought she was over it but obviously wasnt. Or she wouldnt of considered the ex.
Deffo think you need to chalk this one up as an experience & move on.
C xxxxxxxxxxxx
A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (28 July 2007):
 If she said to you she had strong feelings for you but needed space to sort things out with her ex, i think she told you there and then that you would not be getting back together in a very subtle way.
Sorry if that is not what you wanted to hear but that is the way i see it and i would rather tell you straight then give you aload of flannel.
She just did not want to hurt you, i think you just need to try and forget about this one and move on with your life.
Take care.xx.
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