A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Hey so me and my boyfriend had sex for the first time together it was good but became painful at some point and the pain went on for a week or two, now he says he wants to have more but I am scared of the pain and feel I can't do it now so how can I tell him we can't have sex now without making him angry! Please any advice? Thanx in advance Reply to this Question |
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi all jst 2 give an update 2day me en my bf had sex en it only pained a bit i talked him en he was realy gentle thanx alot 4 al of u dat took tym 2 advice.chears!
A
female
reader, satindesire +, writes (19 February 2009):
Did you two not use lube, did he not bring you to orgasm before trying to insert his penis into you?!
Adequate foreplay, oral sex, using a good sex-friendly lube and having an orgasm before intercourse will greatly reduce or even eliminate any pain during sex.
You need to speak up, communicate with him. Does you both know about your clitoris? Have you ever had an orgasm before? Do you masturbate?
He might not know how to please you. The female body is totally different than the male body, all he knows is himself until you teach him. If you can't talk to your partner about sex, then you shouldn't be having sex with him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for the great advice you have all given.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2009): I think u should only do it again if u want to but to be honest the more you do it the less painfull it becomes. yea it hurts the first few times but only for a little while for me it was just the first penatration that hurt then it wasnt so bad. its just sort of something girls have to go through just tell him how you feel if he realy cares for you he will understand and be gental. the more relaxed u are the less painfull it will be.hope this helps x
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A
female
reader, -NothingLasts4ever- +, writes (19 February 2009):
Sex for the first time is always painful. But the more often you do it, the less painful it gets and the more pleasurable it gets.I personally would suggest that you do have sex with your boyfriend. That way it will get less painful and then you'll enjoy it more. Just let him know that you find it painful and ask him to be gentle. You could always build up to it by doing other things. That would relax your muscles.
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A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (19 February 2009):
but theres so many other things besides penetration, tell him he has to use his hands until you feel more comfortable. if he's getting angry tell him to take a hike, sex is for both your pleasure and not just his own. dont be afraid to put yourself first is this situation, look at it like this.. youre the person who has to deal with the pain and he just wants the pleasure, stand up for yourself and good luck.
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A
male
reader, Kepi +, writes (19 February 2009):
I agree completely with mirrorimg361..... it shouldn;t be a painful experience and any guy who cares about a woman, wouldn't want it to be so.Sit down and talk with him, let him know it was a painful experience, discuss why, maybe work out something different, but at the same time, don't be frightened to say no..... its your right and he should respect it.
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A
male
reader, mirrorimg361 +, writes (19 February 2009):
Aw, just remember, it shouldn't be painful the whole time just so he enjoys it. If you're not enjoying it or don't want to do it, he should respect that and be okay with it. I suggest you just tell him that it's very painful for you and you think you should not do it for a while at least until you're ready to again. If he's angry, that's not fair to you, and it shows disrespect. No guy should be angry at his girl for her not feeling comfortable doing something. If you need any more advice, just message me and I'll write back.
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