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School found out I like my teacher and its all sorted, but my teacher is still avoiding me! How do I act next year to make things better?

Tagged as: Crushes, Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 July 2012) 4 Answers - (Newest, 25 July 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

i'm a 14 year old teenager and i have this major crush still on a teacher and at the moment i have summer holidays ,nearly half way through and still feel the same way a lot of things happend last year he even found out because of a student and i even had to go the principal because they thaught i was going to far and yea so now i'm really embarasssed even though it's all spoken to the principale and cleared i really like him and i never wan't to ruin his job i feel very bad because of last year and now i wan't to change.so how should i acct next year so that he can stop avoiding me because i will have him next jear in the studies hours and oh by the way he's a studies teacher please help ??

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2012):

There's not much you can do when you have a crush on someone, it just has to fade naturally. You can try to remember that it is just a crush and it can't/won't develop into anything more. Discipline your mind whenever you find yourself thinking about him. They may not assign him to teach you next year, or he may even put in for a transfer to another class to make it easier on you and so he doesn't feel awkward when he's around you. Apart from that really, all you can do is just wait until the feelings fade naturally.

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A female reader, BondGirl72 United States +, writes (25 July 2012):

BondGirl72 agony auntI also teach, so I can give you the teacher side of it. From our perspective, students who make romantic advancements towards us are nothing but a threat to our jobs. Regardless of whether we like you as students, we will avoid contact with any student who might get us into trouble. Just the mere rumor of student/teacher involvement is enough to cause a lot of trouble for a teacher, including getting us fired. Of course, an investigation would be in order.

When I was a student in high school, I too had a major crush on a teacher. The difference between me and students today is that I knew there was NEVER ANY CHANCE of me being with that teacher. He was a lot older than me, was married and had a family, and was a TEACHER...an authority figure in our community. Today's youth think that anything goes and they don't understand the implications of a student-teacher relationship. If you have a crush on a teacher, it is best to keep it to yourself and do some harmless fantisizing about him. I see nothing wrong with having a crush, but you don't act on it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2012):

I teach and recently had to deal with the same kind of situation with one of my students.

Why do you want him to stop avoiding you for? He's doing you a favour. If you really don't want him to risk his job then leave him alone. The only way you're going to get over him is by limiting your contact with him so that's what he's doing.

How you act is you just drop it OP. I found out when my student approached me and passed me a poem she wrote, I brought her to the principle and we discussed what the deal was.

OP there is nothing wrong with having a crush on a teacher, she's not the first who crushes on me, I can tell a mile away who the others are because they're gazing at me. Just pretend nothing happened and just leave him alone.

He's not going to stop avoiding you, he has to because he has to protect you from being hurt, he cannot feed your feelings for him.

OP you've done nothing wrong, and nothing to be embarrassed about and if you just drop it and get on with life without wanting him to stop avoiding you everything will be fine. So just do that.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2012):

I am afraid there isn't much that you can do now to get him to stop avoiding you. When I was at school, a close friend of mine had a huge crush on a teacher and the principle found out. They spoke to her and it was all sorted, but the teacher avoided her as much as possible, and absolutely nothing she did made them believe she had changed, because the more she tried to do something, it made them think she still had this huge crush. When you are at school, don't try to talk to him unless it is about school work only, be respectful because he is a teacher, but nothing beyond that. Unfortunately what's done is done and nothing will change that now, you will just have to accept that things are going to continue to be like this from now on. My best advice is to concentrate only on your school work when he is around, and only talk to him about school work and only when absolutely necessary. It will be hard, but hang in there you will be fine.

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