A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I rarely get intimate, once every two months to be exact. A couple of days ago I found porn on his computer. That doesn't bother me. What bothers me is that it was titled "Rough Doggie Style" and the first few seconds shows a man standing over a woman and back-handing her. I didn't watch the rest because I was shocked by that alone. How do I approach him? Do I admit to him what I saw? Do I ask him if that something he wants to try? I mean what do I do? It bothers me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2008): i would talk to him about it... and if it were me i would try whatever it was that he was watching if he wanted, but thats just how i am (i will try "almost" anything once).
how do you only have sex like 1 time every 2 months, like thats not even possible for me. i have to have sex at least 5 times a week... but then again i LOVE sex.
umm, that could be one reason he watches porn. i dont know why you two dont have sex, but i would try to maybe have a lil more sex if you are comfortable with it. i mean sex can be amazing, so many different positions to try, so many pleasures that you can get from sex... wow, anyways, i hope this helps..
*Mariah*
A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta  +, writes (16 December 2008):
 rough sex is fine.
have a safe word.. pineapple is a good one.
and finally. don't do something just because you want to please him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just want to thanks those so far for the help. I think maybe this is something he wants to try (rougher sex that is) and is afraid I'll judge him based on it. So I'm going to approach him delicately with it.
Oh and I agree. Doggie Style is an amazing position!!
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A
female
reader, heartbroken . x +, writes (16 December 2008):
porn is normal for guys i think
i mean iwas in class and my best friends who are boys were watching it, i think girls dont really want to see that stuff
if your worried that he wants you to do that
just say to him , im not ready to do that , or u dont feel right if u did that
so dont worie about it
but my best idea is that you tell him about it
he will feel better once he knows that you know
hopeit helps x
heartbroken. x
p.s sorry i am abit young but its just an idea x
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (16 December 2008):
 Hello,
Well of all the porn you could've found, that was pretty tame and typical. Porn always tries to give itself the raunchiest names ever. And, a lot of fellas have a little porn somewhere on their computer for lonely days when they have urges. However, your complete lack of sex life might be indications of a bigger problem with pornography or your relationship.
Maybe this is the push you need to dig deeper. Maybe he does want your sex life to be spiced up but doesn't know how to approach you. I think that maybe by telling him what you found, you could open up a good discussion about sex. Is it something that you two talk about openly?
Doogie style is a really great position, by the way, if you've never tried it. It's my favorite!
Good luck and keep us posted.
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