A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for nearly a year and half now and he recently left the country for a new job 2 months ago after being out of work for 7 months. We have been making it work long distance and are seeing each other every 2nd week at the moment.With the distance between us I have started to feel him more and more distant. When we are together now he is so quiet and distant most of the times and it seems pretty much everything I say and do annoys him. I'm starting to feel more and more unwanted and insecure about the relationship and wondering also if those feelings are perhaps contributing to the way I am experiencing the relationship. It feels to me more draining than enjoyable at the moment and he is no longer affectionate towards me.He is a good guy and it's not easy meeting guys. I think of ending things and moving on but at the same time I wonder if this is as good as it gets and I should try harder to make this work. I don't really know what to do or how to go about thinking this through. Would appreciate some outside perspective
View related questions:
insecure, long distance Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2015): Long distance is very tough. I was in a similar situation for you, my girlfriend moved away and we continued for about 16 months but eventually she just got tired of being alone and that i couldn't be with her in person and she broke up with me.I think long distance can work, but it only works when 2 people contribute the same amount. if you feel that it is always you putting in all of the effort and you receive nothing back, then i would suggest that its time to move on as sad as that is to say.However, it is only 2 months so he could just be homesick. moving to a new country isn't easy. I moved abroad to teach english for 1 year and in the first months i found it difficult and i was quite down a lot. i didnt reply to many of my friends messages for a few weeks. I didnt have a girlfriend at the time so i dont know how it would affect a relationship.I'd give it a bit more time but if you start to feel that the relationship is a one way thing and its draining you of your happiness and energy, of if you find you are always the one who travels to visit, then i think its time to move on.good luck!
|
