A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About 6 months ago I found myself in really bad situation. I had started seeing a guy and after a couple months of dating I was starting to fall for him. I don't know how I didn't see the signs or suspect anything, maybe I did and I was just too happy to notice, but I ended up finding out he was married. I knew he had had a wife at one point but he had insisted they were divorced. It turned out they weren't and she was just living abroad for a while. Obviously we broke it off. He made a few phone calls asking to see me, and I always refused. In the end he left me a voicemail saying he was sorry, saying he hadn't told me because he thought it would put me off. He said they were getting a divorce but there was paperwork and the complex nature of the divorce (he was quite wealthy) meant he thought I would be scared off. So he admitted to lying and said he was sorry. We still didn't get back together though and we went our separate ways. I found it really hard because other than the fact it had just turned out that he was a liar and was actually married, everything had been perfect. I know it was all a lie now, but I was seriously starting to fall for him. Admitedly, the money had something to do with it - he was spoiling me constantly. But there was more to it; he was sweet and the level of attention he lavished on me was very flattering. It made me feel sexy and like a real woman and as if I was worth something. I could see him and I actually getting serious and I was finding it really hard not to fall for him. It was very hard letting all that go and getting on with my life and just accepting he was married.Tonight he phoned me. I had deleted his number from my phonebook so I didnt recognize the number and so picked up. I was really shocked when he said it was him. He asked if I wanted to meet for drink. I just said "You're married." And then he said his divorce papers come through in 4 weeks, would I like to have drinks with him then. I don't know what to do. On one hand it is still in the back of my head all the times we shared together - I may be being silly I know. And on the other hand I just keep thinking how upset I was when he hurt me and how angry my friends would be if I even considered going anywhere near him again.What should I do?
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