A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a 23 year old male who is a collegiate athlete and never had any kind of mental or physical problems in my life. No trying to boast but I am not an ugly looking guy and my gf who i have been dating for 8 months exclusively and been with for like the last 2 years is pretty much the replica of a playboy bunny. 99% of my friends i am the luckiest guy on the earth to be dating such an amazing girl and great looks she has. When we were not exclusive i would be on her like white on rice when we were not dating we would have great sex and i would never have the problems of staying hard or keeping my minds off other experiences, at the same time i was with other people as well. Well now that we've been dating, pretty much right off the bat from dating i have had this problem of not staying hard or even getting hard no matter what she did or even orally would not work for me. We have always been a considerable distance from one another like 5 hours and now that we are dating she moved closer and i see her all the time. I love her so much but the sex is dead like a 20 year old body in the grave. I never have the urge to do anything with her, i would rather masturbate to the internet then have sex with her because i know 95% of the time it wont happen. The only way i can ever have sex is thinking of other people if i dont think of other people then i can't have sex. Idk what to do and any help would defiantly be appreciated!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): This is something you can definitely work through if you truly love this girl, have you thought about going to talk to someone about your problems? You talk about yourself being good looking and being with other girl's when you weren't exclusive with her before, maybe you feel the need of attention from multiple girl's to make your self feel good about your self, and a counselor, psychiatrist, or even a pastor at an anonymous church (if you're comfortable with that) can possibly help with that. Also you talk about you'd rather look at things online, possibly refrain from that to get your mind out of the gutter and focus on the one you love! God Bless!
A
female
reader, aquamarine  +, writes (18 February 2010):
 Everything seams to be about looks in your world. Why are you with her? If you cant have sex with her without thinking of someone else then you oviously bored of the sex or you dont want her. Are you sure you never just went for her in the first place because of her looks? thats not the right reasons to be in a realtionship, they certainly help, but you dont mention anything about her personality which makes me believe that you dont love her. Maybe its time to move on hun. In future might be a good idea to look beyond the skin :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2010): Maybe it's too much pressure on you to be perfect? I always try and pay attention to what people post besides their actual question, and you brought up how good looking you are (thats an honest thing) and how great looking she is. However you said "everyone says Im lucky" instead of saying that you feel lucky yourself. I don't think you're dating her just because she's so hot, you said you love her a lot, and I believe that. But can it be that you feel everyone eyes are on the two of you? And seeing as you are now the "perfect" couple in others eyes, and you have the "perfect" girlfriend, you feel more pressure than ever to perform perfectly in the bedroom as well.
To try and see if that is the case, why not the two of you take some time away, go on vacation, or just take a weekend trip somewhere not too far away. Anything where you can be alone and focus on each other and you get a chance to not bother with what others things. Be a little nasty with each other like burp and fart or something silly, that can take the edge of the "perfection". Often people find themselves having the best sex ever when they dont care what their partner or anyone else will think of them. So try to relax. After all you KNOW this isn't because of her or you, because the sex before was fine.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (16 February 2010):
This is proof that she is not the one and that you're not ready for a relationship. Let her go and find someone who does love her while you spend time on your own life.
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