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No contact for 5 months, finding out things. What else is he hiding?

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 April 2013) 1 Answers - (Newest, 17 April 2013)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Ok lets start from the beginning..... My friend set me up. I was leaving work and she calls me and asked me what I was doing after work. I told her I was going home she than told me I should stop by. So 2 busses latter I called her and said I would be there in a hour. She told me to look good she had someone she wanted me to meet. When I got to her place there were two guys sitting outside on her front porch.One in mediately started talking to me as soon as I got there I went in the house and she followed me I asked her which one was for me she told me the quiet one. I told her they needed to go somewhere so we could talk. Her and her guy friend left. I started to talk to my prince. I found out he had got in trouble with the law once for carrying a concealed weapon and he was going to court for that within the next couple of months. He told me about his ex and how they had been together for 7yrs but broke up because he could not do the long distance thing. I told him about my ex and how he cheated on me and how he had his sister break up with me because he couldn't. We talked for 2hrs maybe more but it honestly only felt like mins. When I realized what time it was I told him I had to go and I asked him if he would walk me to the bus stop and he started to but his cousin told him they have to leave soon so he asked his cousins to drive me to the bus stop where he set in the back seat next to me. Than when we got to the bus stop he got out the car and opened the door for me. I did not give him my number but I told him to call me. I honestly wanted to see if he saw me as waste of time or if he thought I was worth the hassle of getting my number. A couple of days later he called and after that we hit it off. He would hop on the bus 3 hours just to see me and after a while he started to stay the night. Our first kiss he actually asked me for my permission first I found that so sweet. As his court day was coming up he started coming around less became more distant. I started getting mad because he was being so distant. He came to my place one last time and left his watch and asked me to keep it safe. I said ok not realizing that I wouldn't see you for over a year. After that he disappeared. I felt abandoned so after 3 months of no word from him I started dating again but it did not feel right. So I cut it off that watch had a hold on me it had to go. I started cleaning my past out and the watch went with it. 2.5 months after he got out he calls me and we talked and it was great. He came by to see me and kissed me and it was nice but I felt he was holding back. We talked and he told me he has a 8month old daughter. I just said ok and asked him what his plan was and he said she would be better off with out him. I love him but he needs to man up. I told him I would always be there and I ment it. I no I was wrong giving his watch away so I got him a pocket watch and im waiting for our picnic to give it to him. He is speical to me andI ddon't want to lose him. When I got the pocket watch made I called my friend and she looked him up on facebook. After finding him on facebook I googled him. It turns out he did not get locked up untill 5 months after we "lost contact" . This is information I did not no. I don't want to bring it up but I can't help but wonder what was going on in that 5mth period. I want to wait it out but I can't help but think if he kept that from me what else is he keeping from me. What should I do?

View related questions: broke up, cheated on me, cousin, facebook, his ex, long distance, my ex, period

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A female reader, Faded Lights Canada +, writes (17 April 2013):

If he just straight up left you for that long, hes not worth it. He could easily do it again. I know you care a lot for him but hes obviously got some serious explaining to do to you and if hes not willing to spill then I'd say you need o move on again. It was unfair t do what he did to you without giving any explanation.

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