A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I have put our house up for sale as we are looking to move away to a different town due to my husband’s job. We have lived in our house for 12 years.Our neighbors (who lived there long before we arrived) are nice enough but just set in their ways. On occasions they can be a little intrusive and nosey but over time we’ve learnt to deal with them. Since they found out our house was up for sale (4 months ago) they keep asking who is viewing the house and have also told us the type of people they do not want us selling the house too which I find completely out of order! I understand they are concerned about their new neighbors but giving us a list of who we can and cant sell too is beyond ridiculous!!They are both retired (in their mid 70’s) and have plenty of time on their hands which they have admitted to looking out their window whenever they see a car pull up to suss out any new potential owners. We had a young couple come view it the other week and as soon as they left the neighbors came over and told us they didn’t like their car as it was old and would make the neighborhood messy if we sold to them. Ok the car wasn’t in the best condition but they were lovely and just starting out and looking to buy their first home!We have been firm with them and told them that we would let them know once we sell the house and to not keep bombarding us but it just goes in one ear and out the other- in their opinion they are just looking out for the neighborhood- which as I said before I completely understand as no one wants to live next to a troubled family and we want to keep the area nice. We live in a quiet cul de sac with 6 houses. Everyone that has lived there has done so for over 15 years- we were the newest neighbors to the street.The other neighbors are fine and have wished us luck. I’m guessing there is nothing more we can do to stop them interfering? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2023): I beg to differ from the others that I find their concern is understandable because they are worried that the value of their property would decline once undesirable families move there. I agree it is not a big concern of you who moves there once you are gone.
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (21 August 2023):
 This is not about being elderly, but about being rude. If they're in their 70s, they're likely boomers, and they weren't called 'the Me Generation' for nothing. Unfortunately, it seems many from that generation are quite comfortable patronising everyone older or younger than they are.
I would remain cordial, but stop volunteering information (conversationally) and answer your door less often, and I would NOT inform them when the house is sold. They'll find out the same way any other neighbour would.
The next time they manage to corner you with rude remarks about prospective buyers, just say what you said to us. 'They seem like a lovely couple' then tell them you're very busy and bid them a good day. Be a happy steamroller.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2023): Some good advice here. Not sure what all the fuss is about. Neighbours rarely see things the same and you seem to be over reacting to yours. You talk as if they are making the fuss. But why do you make so much out of what they say? Why not must be amused by it or ignore it altogether? A wise person would agree with them to their face and then do whatever they wish later. These people are not your parents or boss, you do not have to talk to them at all. For one moment though look at it from their point of view. You would be the same if you were their age with their life next door to a place that is being sold. Of course they don't want someone with a tatty car or noisy kids there. Common sense tells you that. But common sense also tells you that you must put your needs first before theirs and you owe them nothing. You do not need to please them, just rub along with them until you are gone. That may mean the odd white lie or fib to make things go smoother.People of seventy must know that things do not always go the way they want, some days are good some bad, sometimes bad things happen. That is why they are worried that you will choose the wrong couple to buy your house. This is what I would say to them... we are going to auction the house to the highest bidder, feel free to put in a bid. That way if you do sell to someone who is dirty, noisy, smelly, creepy, you can put it down to oh well they had more money than the others. Nobody could possibly find fault with you for selling to the highest bidder. But they could think you were being petty or nasty if you sold to an undesirable over a desirable if both offering the same amount.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  + ♥, writes (18 August 2023):
 I will just reiterate what others have said. I don't think your neighbors mean to be pains in the butt...although they are! Older people sometimes have too much time on their hands and too much energy. Its understandable that they are curious/worried but its life and you truly don't owe them any explanations. If it were me I would TRY to be cordial and pacify them if possible but I would also start making the talk less and less and just maintain that you are busy etc and if possible just not speak to them if it can be avoided. As others said, when you move, you won't need to talk to them anymore so if it turns out you hurt their feelings by not being so chatty oh well! Good luck with everything!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (17 August 2023):
 "I’m guessing there is nothing more we can do to stop them interfering?"
Probably not,
However, if it interferes with your sale of the house - in an ACTUAL manner (as they do not seem to come up to potential buyers and say stuff) - you might need to consider talking to a solicitor.
Personally? I would just "Placate" them with the: " Of course we not going to accept the first bidder - we want to keep the area nice. and stick to that."
When you hit 70, you are not going to care much what others think of your behavior lol And I get their perspective, however, it's not really up to them who you sell your house to.
Just do you, and I hope you get a great price for your house and a safe move.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2023): They are old and have nothinh better to do. They are also scared of what kind of poeple you may sell the house to. They are fully aware that they have zero control over your decision. So, they are bugging you.
There's one thing you could do - stop answering their questions and talking about it with them. And change the subject when they speak about it or just tell them that you are in a hurry. This is not very nice, but you need to protect yourselves. You're leaving soon anyhow.
We have an appartment and the man whose family once owned the whole building adapted the attick above us into an appartment! We have no idea how he got the permits since the soundproofing is non existant - we can hear people whisper. It was sold and resold and now it's rented out to a young woman who recently found a bf and he moved in too. Needles to say, the situation is not ideal, but what can we do?
The same goes to your neighbors. Once they leave their house, other neighbors will have no say in to whom the house will be sold to. It's the way it is.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2023): Personally, I would just let what these neighbours say enter in my right ear and promptly go out off the left. These are older people, set in their ways, with lots of time on their hands and have already proven themselves a bit nosey. Just let them talk and ignore what they say, pretty soon you won't have to hear them anymore.
OTH, and for the same reason, if they really get your goat, you can afford to be more esplicit and assertive and tell them straight out that whom you sell your house to is no skin off their nose ,so they can stop talking about it. Because, even if they get offended ( they probably will ) ..does it matter to you ? Soon they won't be your neighbours anymore , you can live with them being offended.
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