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female
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anonymous
writes: Dear allPlease help me out, I am 26 years old and a very pretty and attractive lady but I have never had a serious relationship with a guy. All my relationships wont go past a month. I have tried everything on planet to make the relationship work. The longest relationship I have ever had was lasted for 3 years, but I think its because we were in a distance relationship with a guy? Can someone help me to identify why do i attract bad guys, People in the community label me as a whore whereas its the guys that break up with me and not the other way round. I feel like they are only interested to sleep with me and after that the relationship is down the drain.It does not help if I keep the guy in suspense, the guy that I dated for three months without sex, when we finally had it he later pulled away and I felt like there is no formula. My friends think I am not patient with guys, because I chop and change and there is a lot of things I cannot stand in a relationship...things like (someone having another woman, or being rude and treating me with respect) I run away from such relationshipsI am tired of changing guys and i feel i deserve to be in a loving longterm relationship.Sometimes I attract the guys that are in relationships and I become a little impatient.... Is there something I am not doing right? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006): Hi!
I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I think you've just been dating the wrong men. And I think bad press is not helping either. I think you should relax, men can sense your anxiety and most people don;t start a relationship thinking they're going to spend the rest of their life with that person. It's scary to commit to someone you barely now.
I don't think you attract the bad guy, I think you're attracted to the bad guy. Bad guys are exciting. But next time you meet a guy don't stay in the facade, think whether that guy is what you want or not before you go into serious dating.
You know you're not a whore, so keep that in mind and ignore people saying otherwise, they're just jealous probably because you're a very attractive woman, and we women can be very bitchy with other women.
If you want a committed relationship straight away, why don't you try online dating? That way you'll find men with your same interests and in the same frame of mind.
Hope it helps!!
A
female
reader, Nikita  +, writes (8 December 2006):
 What you need to do is take a step back away from looking for a relationship and just spend some time being with friends and doing your own thing. Dont go looking for a guy when you go out. I think sometimes that we give out the wrong signals when we're out looking for someone to have a relationship with and sometimes we can look a little desperate maybe and that does tend to put the right guys off and attract the bad guys. I used to be a bit like this and I was always ending up with bad guys who did nothing for my self confidence and who treated me badly so I stopped looking and one day i found myself a real nice man. Sounds a bit of a cliche but its true. Stop trying with men and just go out and have fun. You're young and pretty and dont need to be in a relationship all the time. Concentrate on your career maybe or hobbies. Eventually you will find the right man for you. Good luck.
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