A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Iam 42 years old, married for 18.5 years after a long distance relation for 6 years. Iam married to my high school love. My problem is that Iam very unhappy in my marriage - I was a very smart student, extroverted, happy, bubbly and top achiever. I also have a successful career. However I have become miserable in my marriage mainly due to my husband’s flirtatious nature when around women with big breasts, in addition he has also about 8 years back commented on how small my breasts were(36B) and asked me to do something about it, he also passed nasty comments on how some dresses dont suit me because it only suits big breasted women. He passed such comments few times in a span of 2 years. I didnt respond initially as I was upset about it but somehow told myself to believe it didnt happen and move on. However the comments stopped only when I told him that I would get bigger breasts when he would enlarge his small sized penis! Since then he has told me he loves my breasts and that he is happy with them but I believe he is just stating that to appease me. He gets flirtatious with big breasted women and also comments to me about how much weight some of my friends have put on. Iam a slender woman who rocks the office with my intelligence and knowledge. Iam also not going to do breast augmentation. But deep down I feel Iam not enough for my husband - Iam not his type. All this has Lead to me having depression and serious thoughts of ending the marriage. But my husband says that Iam overthinking and that he has no such wishes anymore. I have 2 kids and dont want to break the family. My husband is good in all other aspects - supportive, helps around the house, no abuse. Iam myself a Product of a broken home and I had always promised myself that I would never end up in a divorce, but deep down Iam sad because Iam not good enough partner in this marriage. I also dont know if Iam overthinking or if my husband has suddenly started loving my breasts which he didnt like a few years back. Is it possible that my husband is lying to save our marriage just the way Iam pretending to have a happy life? Should I leave or should i stay?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2021): Oh my.I just wonder why you are still even with this turd.Is it because you lack self esteem?Girl find someone who's eyes light up when you enter a room.Get someone who loves you for you.You deserve a great love like I descibed.Do not settle for a turd!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2021): You can go on Amazon, and buy one of those exaggerated breastplates the drag queens wear. You can get any size teats you want; and they look quite real. You can give him the illusion of having gigantic knockers; and keep the ones God, nature, and genetics blessed you with.
You've survived a six-year long-distance relationship and 18 years of marriage, and you don't know how to check this guy???
If your husband is going to cheat on you; it won't be necessarily for a woman with big boobs. It's a matter of timing and opportunity; you don't always luck-out and find your ideal fantasy-lady. In many cases, the woman willing to cheat with a married-man either wants a sugar-daddy; or she doesn't look anywhere as attractive as his wife. If she is attractive, he's messing-up her head! Meanwhile, he's trying not to get divorced, and cleaned-out for all he's worth! They always get caught. If they leave you, they've done you a favor. Why keep a cheater? Why kill yourself with worry over somebody you know doesn't love you?
To be a successful cheater, he has to strike when the opportunity comes his way; if he always waited for nothing but big-breasted women, he'd have to specifically find one who wants to cheat with him. Like that'll happen any given day of the week!
I think you knocked the ball out of the park with the "small-penis" remark. If that didn't level the playing-field, I don't know what will! It's usually the guys with tiny peepees (dinky-d!cks) putting their girlfriends and wives down about their bodies. As if they are so hot to trot, and happen to be god's-gift; and can be so choosy!
When he's acting like a leg-humping dog around big-breasted females in your presence, tell him exactly what he looks like. A drooling leg-humping fool!
If you have insecurities and fear he's going to cheat on you; it won't be for what YOU lack. It will be for what he is lacking. That being...decency, fidelity, and trustworthiness.
He said some rotten things. If he is unaware of how that affected you emotionally and how it attacked your self-esteem; drag him to a marriage counselor. Make him have to sit through sessions, where he is required to hear you out; and be accountable for how he is damaging his marriage and abusing you. That doesn't mean you personally don't have to get-a-grip; and realize you can't go through life feeling down on yourself, because you weren't born a big-chested super-model.
You've got what the good Lord gave you. If you're not happy with that; you should consider what it's like to be missing some body parts. You could be blind, deaf, physically-disabled, have severe scars from burns, or missing limbs. I'm sure there are women out there who would be happy to exchange places with you; while you're busy feeling insecure and being unhappy with the size of your boobs...because "your husband" thinks they're not big enough! It's not all on your husband, it's also how you feel about yourself. He's not completely to blame. No man holds your self-worth entirely in his hands, unless you give it to him!
Is he handsome enough, is he rich enough, is he nice enough, is he good enough for anybody other than you? Nobody's perfect, and you can't just throw away your marriage; because he hurt your feelings. You have to make him stop; and if it takes dragging his @$$ through marriage counseling, make it so. Otherwise, drag him through divorce court, and let him go find himself a cow with a big utter...who likes drooling leg-humping fools! Who like to say stupid things!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2021): Sorry to hear this as I know how you feel. I am also slender and I once had a boyfriend say I had the body of a 10 year old. So I called him a pedophile for dating me anyway. It continued and I said I’d get implants if he’d get taller (he was my height) We didn’t last much longer.
Negative comments on your partners body feels like emotional or verbal abuse to me. I think that’s why it still bothers you bc it was traumatic. Have you tried counseling? It’s harder w marriage and kids involved.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2021): Big breasts have several downsides - back pain, you can't lie down on your stomach, and bras that are generally considered ugly.
He would probably not like it if you told him his penis was too small, although what if his penis really is big and he's just pretending it's small to avoid looking too egotistical?
Bigger is better in some areas of life, but not always in this, is the moral here.
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