A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend's 14 year old brother acts very weird around her. When on car rides he will lean his head on her shoulder and tell her how he loves her in a strange, kind of lonely way. He still kisses his mom on the lips and will go into my girlfriend's room and tell her goodnight every night without knocking and no matter what she is doing. He is very socially awkward, and my girlfriend's friends agree with me on that. I really don't know what to do about it, it just really creeps me out. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): I have a brother with autism, and it was the first thing I thought of when reading this post.
It's quite possible that your girlfriend's brother may have an undiagnosed developmental disability. Either way, he's her brother, and it's none of your business. Be nice.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): I don't think it's creepy, I think he just loves his sister and is probably feeling a bit insecure around you as another man vying for her affections. Hey when I go home I lean on my brother's shoulder, I kiss my granny on the lips, I hug my dad, whatever. There's nothing weird, odd or creepy about it. Also bear in mind that her brother is only 14- that's young! He's just a child, maybe a little bit immature, but I don't see any harm being done here.
It seems to me that YOU are creeped out by this behaviour, maybe feeling a bit insecure as well, and you want to turn this problem into being the brother's fault. You say that your gf's friends also think it's odd. What about your gf? What does she say about it? Or haven't you asked her? The reason I say this is that it seems sad that you are discussing her brother in negative terms with her friends behind her back. I don't think that's very kind.
Just accept him for who he is and be done with it. There's nothing you can do.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 April 2012):
 Yep he sounds very Aspie to me....
I have a 28 yr old son who lives in a group home but before we have new friends meet him we WARN them about his social issues...
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (15 April 2012):
 Creepy ? Mild Asperger ?
Why, poor kid ?
He's 14 ! He may perhaps still be a bit childish for his age, but , not all 14 y.o. are into " doing their own thing " and partying, sexting girls , acting tough, and what not. Many, particularly the shy ones, are just big cuddly puppies with a soft spot for big sis.
I can understand, to some extent, your unease, because I am not a very physically demonstrative person, and I use my hugs and kisses sparingly , so at times I am vaguely uncomfortable when people display an high level of closeness and intimacy even with close family members. But I realize that , if there's a problem, I am the one who has it, not them.
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A
male
reader, Hugh.J  +, writes (15 April 2012):
 "Honeypie", Asperger's syndrome was the first thing that entered my mind. I think this boy needs to have an assessment by a medical or psychiatric practitioner.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): I kiss my mum too, although not on the lips, and I also lean on my brother's shoulder and he kisses me on my head and wishes me good night most days, well we really do get on very well, maybe your gf's brother is really jealous and keeps saying he loves her as to make sure he's still got a place in her heart, especially considering he doesn't have many friends, having her as a sister/friend is important for him, he may feel relegated to a second place in her attentions now she's with you. As to what you can do, you can do nothing, he is her brother, and I've never heard of ex-brother, but of ex- bf yes, try to be understanding, maybe he really has problems...
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A
female
reader, Bball02Megan +, writes (15 April 2012):
Maybe he is just, worried that her sister is getting into some kind of mischief . He might just love his family a lot. i still kiss my mom. but on the cheek. lol. Don't take it to seriously. its your girlfriends brother so if i were you i wouldn't take it the wrong wayy. he is probably just looking out for his family. ?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): Awww come on man, thats her BROTHER. I don't think theres anything to be worried about.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (15 April 2012):
 There can be many reasons as to why he behaves this way, he could be on the low end of the Asperger Scale, which can explain his poor social skills. Though most people with Asperger are not to "fond" of being physically close to others, he might get some kind of comfort out of it.
Or he is overcompensating for his lack of social skills with being cuddly with his family.
I don't really see anything creepy in any of the behavior you mentioned.
Some families have certain routines that YOUR family may not have, that doesn't make him creepy.
I can see what you NEED to do about it. If your GF is between 18-21 it "shouldn't" be too long before she moved out on her own anyways. I don't think your GF's little brother and his behavior is your concern honestly.
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