A
male
age
30-35,
*illiam5
writes:So i had my second girlfriend ever and we broke up about....a hour ago. I'm fine with the fact that she broke up with me, I knew she was too good for me anyway so i expected it. its just her excuse for why we are breaking up, apparently I'm a great boyfriend she even used the word perfect; the excuse was "iv been depressed lately"...and this has anything to do with your boyfriend that only wants to make you happy...how? I'm fine with her breaking up with me just if i was depressed i would want to be with someone that loves me not break up with them. Again i don't mind i kind of knew something was wrong I just wish she could give me a better reason than I'm depressed. Is there any deeper reason to this? I don't understand her excuse for breaking up with me. And none of that you don't really care about her you just wanted to get into her pants. yes i wanted sex so i chose the virgin asexual shy girl OF COURSE. I really just wanted a relationship. Thank you :D
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 October 2011):
 Actually, depression has a lot to do with love life. Depressed people often have sharp declines in sexual desire , or total loss of libido, they lack physical and mental energy, they lose interest also in what they have always found most enjoyable ( including the company of their SOs ). They can't concentrate on conversations, and planning even the simplest outing is overwhelming. So, no, it's quite possible that if you were depressed you would not get at all a great comfort from being in the arms of your partner.
Yet, it does sound a bot of an excuse in this case. I mean, you would have noticed if she had been depressed right ? Depression also alters mood, sleep patterns, appetite,personal hygiene, etc. etc. If she has been her normal cheerful self and all of a sudden she is only depressed about dating, yeah, probably she wanted to get out of the relationship in a diplomatic way . In order not to hurt your feelings. You know , the classic " it's not you, it's me ".
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2011): It sounds like an excuse to get out of the relationship. The relationship wasn't really what she expected or wanted, perhaps, and this was the easiest way of breaking up.
I wouldn't worry about it too much, really. Yes, it's painful and upsetting and confusing, but if a girl can't even be honest about how she feels about you, the relationship is likely doomed to failure anyway.
You seem like a funny guy with a great personality; you should have no problem in the dating scene.
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