A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok i'm 21, my girlfriends 7 months pregnant and i stay with her and her parents. one problem i'm not in love with her, i'm in love with my ex who is also in love with me. my girl is a great person i just don't think she's the one for the rest of my life like the road looks like it's going. so what would be the best way to handle this situation? i need to break it off but should i wait til the baby's born or do it soon. i'm just confused please help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2010): BE A MAN. my ex left me when i was pregnant because he said he didnt love me anymore. a real dad will stick up for his new family.
A
female
reader, lolakim  +, writes (12 September 2009):
So you know that your ex is still in love with you? What i see here is that you are just not ready for the baby. You want a single life with no attachments. You have been seeing your ex...i'm positive. You are a dirtbag and I hope that you leave as soon as possilbe. That girl doesn't deserve to be treated like that nor the innocent baby. Just so you know...you will have to pay child support. And I will predict that sometime in your life that ex of yours will DUMP YOU.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2007): I understand how you're feeling, but you need to understand that making a baby is a big deal - you're bringing life into the world. You do not have to stay with the girl if you don't love her and you do not even need to see her - you have rights as the father, but remember the girl could force you to pay child maintenance payments and have that enforced by law, so be careful. There are organisations and websites that can offer you advice and help you. Email me if you need more advice, i've been there!
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A
female
reader, shivon1705  +, writes (30 July 2007):
 just because your having a baby doesnt mean you have to be with herjust aslong as your there for your baby people go on about how bad men are who walk out on them but thats about walking out on the baby not them, you 2 can still be friendsyou just need to be there for the baby and still be its dadyou need to do it gentley and calmly let her down as easy as you can you just need to tell her your not inlove with her anymore but you still want your baby and want to be friends hun waiting until the baby is born wont make it any better you need to do it as soon as possible befor she gets any more attached to you, you need to be careful what you say her hormoans will be all over the placebut its better to tell her sooner rather than latergood luckkeep us posted xxx
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A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (30 July 2007):
Hi,
What a mess. Are you really in love with your ex or is it just rose-tinted spectacles now that you aren’t together? You need to be really sure about this, because you are about to make a very big mess of two peoples lives, one of whom (the baby), is a total innocent. If you know that your relationship with your girlfriend can’t last, you have to tell her. Waiting until the baby is born won’t make it any better. She needs to know where she stands, painful though that will be. She has her life to live, and delaying the inevitable is just wasting her time. You have a responsibility to the baby that has nothing to do with your relationship with it’s mother though. So think about how you are going to deal with this. If you are determined on this course, you should be moving out from her parents house as soon as possible, because you aren’t going to be Mr Popular when you break the news. Don’t rush into such a big decision. If you decide to end it, be ready to move out, break the news, and promise to stick by the baby. Sorry to be such an old-fashioned woman – but next time be sure you mean it before you make babies. A baby is a very big deal, it deserves to have a dad that is there for life.
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