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My foreskin doesn't retract when I get an erection. I'm concerned this will affect my ability to enjoy sex!

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 January 2006) 27 Answers - (Newest, 16 September 2012)
A , anonymous writes:

Hi

When my penis is about to erect or erected I can pull back hardly any of the skin - only probably enough to see the tip of the head. If i try to pull back more it hurts. I'm worried if this will effect when / if I have sex, as there is this girl I'm meeting soon who isn't a virgin herself (I am) and says she may want to have sex with me!

Sounds good I know, but I don't wanna rush into things, mainly cos of if I did have sex with her that when I put my penis in her vagina I won't be able to put it in a lot due to the too much hurting skin problem. Am I different due to this?

View related questions: erection, foreskin, my penis, vagina

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A male reader, Jamest00001 United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2012):

To solve phimosis (tight foreskin):

Masturbating in the wrong way can cause phimosis.

Scientific study: http://www.cirp.org/library/treatment/phimosis/beauge/

The penis basically consists of 3 spongy balloon-like chambers that fill with blood on erection.

See Diagram: http://en.academic.ru/dic.nsf/enwiki/265769o

This page shows functions and mobility: http://www.circumstitions.com/completeman/

The foreskin is attached to the glans by the frenulum: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frenulum_of_prepuce_of_penis

Masturbating can be damaging to the penis if you apply too much pressure. It damages the spongy tissue chambers of the penis. Consequently the 3 spongy chambers do not fill out with blood and expand the skin. Consequently you end up with a tight foreskin. A sensitive glans (head) is a sign of damage. So what you need to do is allow repair to happen. Don't masturbate as much. And when you do masturbate, don't do it for a long time. Too much masturbation (especially with the wrong technique) can also cause micro-tears in the skin, which form scar tissue; scar tissue is less elastic than unscarred tissue.

So, make sure you are not using a damaging masturbation technique. Just lightly grip the penis and move the foreskin up and down.

Once the inside structure starts to repair, the 3 spongy chambers of the penis will inflate to their proper position and this should expand the outside skin and there will be extra 'give' when trying to pull the foreskin down. In time, it will then be easier to retract the foreskin over the head.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2010):

Buddy I was going through all the post. I do have the same issue but yeah i can retract it when semi or not erect. I never had any problem during sex because of this. I am happily married man & to tell you don't worry about that. Keep enjoying your life.

Cheers

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010):

hey bud, same thing just happened to me last week lol thats weird, the first time for me did hurt a lil bit bro i wont lie to you, but after it lubed itself up enough from her and my pre cum it slid back alot easier and didnt hurt so bad, it hurts alot more if your not fully erext, and may i suggest a well lubed condom, it works ALOT better for sex because then our foreskin cant get pulled back.

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A male reader, skinman Australia +, writes (8 June 2010):

skinman agony auntThese days it's all about rational not radical fix !!

Tightness of the foreskin (phimosis) is easily fixed...

BETAMETHASONE CREAM 0.05% ...

is a topical (surface) steroid cream which is massaged

into the foreskin, twice daily, for 4 to 6 weeks.

Problem rectified...

Cheers ~ an intact and happy guy

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2010):

thanks for the advice

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2010):

I have 3 sons ages 16 12 and 10 years old. I always pull back their foreskin when I bathe them and before they go to bed I rub baby oil on the head of their penis. After I pull their foreskin over the head of their penis I leave the head exposed so it isnt so sensitive. They have never had any problems.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2010):

im the same its so annoying i dont know if you can get circumcised when your older but i wish i could you cant really put your penis in that far during sex but now i think ill try some of the suggestions here thanks guys!!!

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A male reader, canisay937 United Kingdom +, writes (14 January 2010):

hello dude :)

please dont think your weird or anything dude i have the same thing. and i do agree with the people telling you to stretch it. but if that doesnt work for you man then dont worrie it doesnt affect sex in any major way. of course you should be using a condom anyway (at least i hope so) that will make it easier for you. i have done it both with and without (i was drunk no excuse not to wear a rubber)and i had no problem at all. if she is a virgin too then its going to be new to both of you so it will be slow and delicate process. that reduses the risk of you hurting yourself. oh but yea it doesnt hurt wen u go hard so dnt forget to do that (some ladys like it :P) hope ur cool dude :)

feel good about urself

everyones body is different

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009):

you have something called Phimosis which is You can't pull the foreskin Too far back Don't force it Back because it Will rip very easily

use some Stretching methods Like when in your bath when the skin is Most flexibale and try to pull it back hold it in that spot for like a few minutes then you might see results if you keep doing that over a few weeks

Remember do it in the bath or Shower

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009):

Hello everyone,

I am 30 yrs old and lead a healthy sex life. When I was 14 I discovered I had the same problem. My foreskin hardly retracted and only 20% of the penis head was only visible.

Based on my experience this are the facts:

1. The size of your penis will be severely restricted if the foreskin does not let it go loose.

2. Apply soap/oil daily and practice regular masturbation. Slowly try everyday to remove it a little bit. If you have never removed your foreskin before it will be damn tight the first time. No alcohol based lotion please it will burn the skin.

3. There are two contact points between the penis and skin, one close to the head and one at the base of the head. Both should tear at some time in due time and give you complete freedom. There will be a little bleeding but dont worry, it will stop as fast as it started. Unless both are gone good penetration is not possible except for lube or condoms.

Please remember if it hurts now just by tring with hand, it hurt 10 times more when you have sex specially if the lady is virgin/inexperienced.

As in my case, foreskins goes down good 1-2 inches even below the base of head. It should exposes a muscular vein filled healthy inner penile muscles which all of girl friends will relish to see.

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A male reader, pakman Ireland +, writes (3 October 2009):

I'm 37 and my foreskin won't retract either, i only found out earlier this year that it was uncommon. i've lived this long with it this way so i don't see the point of changing it now.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2009):

Hey everyone,

I was just reading all these comments and I never knew that we were required to wash a penis quite regularly inside as well as out. I popped to the bathroom and gave it a wash, and once I dried it, I pulled back and it was stretching further back... Just from one further wash!

So I went on and washed it a further two more times for today and it's stretching back further each time.

**Note my Display Name lol**

I would highly reccomend washing thoroughly before checking with a Dr. It could just be from lack of washing. I only wish that I didn't go through the months of concern about my penis and wish that my parents had told me to be careful.

All the best to everyone.

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A male reader, Intact United States +, writes (4 October 2008):

There's nothing necessarily wrong with your penis, although I understand why you want to be retractable like most guys.

See this testimonial before you do anything:

http://www.circumstitions.com/Restric/adult-non-retr.html#adult

He's fine with it. If you're not, I suggest trying a few things yourself, such as keeping the inner foreskin moist with pure aloe vera gel. Gentle stretching over time may loosen it.

If that doesn't work, see a "foreskin friendly" doctor who's willing to prescribe steroid cream. A stretching regimen along with that should render you a "convertible" in short order.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2008):

ok well i read all the responses and i still havent found out how ti fix my problem. im 15 and i am not a virgin but the only time ive had sex is with a condom so my foreskin issue wasnt a problem. but i concerned for when i get older because my foreskin wont fold back/. when it is not erected i can pull the skin back but only if i go really slow. i tried most of the things u guys said but it still doesnt work. my foreskin wont fold back! helpp!!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2008):

Well well lemme share my knowledge too...Well i am 21 yrs male and few months back i had the same problem that my foreskin wont retract...BTW i am uncircumcised..I infact didn't even knew that it was supposed to retract till the back of my penis head. Until i discussed it with one of my friend...So i was kinda surpised..When i tried to pull back my foreskin it really hurt and i was scared of having a short frenulum...This condition is Known as Frenulum Breve(In medical terms)...Second condition most often recognised amongst the males is Phimosis...In this case instead of having a short frenulum the penis has a very tight foreskin so can be hard to roll it over...So concerned and paranoid about my new found condition i started to get as much info as possible about such conditions via internet...Well Frenulum breve can be cured by some kinda Z-stitch method in which they readjust your frenulum size and for phemosis many creams can be used...But i dont think thats reqd as came across quite a few guys on the net who can have sex even though suffering from phimosis...So i visited an urologist and let him examin myself.....And while examination he himself pulled my foreskin back like there was no big deal in it....I guess i was being too scared to do it myself....He told to do it on regular basis and also to clean the inner part as it had some white stains on it...i guess it was cum...So now i can retract it without any pain and my life is as happy as it can be...Moral of the story...I wasn't suffering for any of the aforementioned conditions but the same may not be the case with you....Firstly try to pull back ur foreskin urself in case it really pains or if u dont wanna take any risk of injuring urself then the best was it to fix an appointment with a urologist...It's always better to get over ur anxiety and come to a solid conclusion....

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A female reader, MomOfaBoy United States +, writes (10 August 2008):

Ok boys, i just got back from the emergency room with my 17 yr old son.He was circumcised when he was a baby but they didn't cut back enough so it looked like he had never been circumcised to begin with.Throughout the years, I had always know to pull the skin back and wash and dry it daily, but once he got older and started bathing himself, he didn't do this even though I reminded him that he should, yeah-yeah Mom he would say.I warned him that if he didn't do this the skin would stick to the sides and become attached to the head of his penis and that when it came time to have sex it would not pull back correctly as he was entering her and even be painful when he tried.Well, he finally started listening to me and started to try and clean it properly but it was too late, it had stuck to the sides of his penis and would not pull back to expose the head of his penis.We made a appointment with the Dr and he examined him and said he would have to have a circumcision.The next day he started to really try and get the skin to pull back and a little did but it was very painful and it made a small tear on the side of the head plus it got stuck in a halfway retracted position,you could only see half of the head of his penis,and it stayed that way!He tried to pull the skin back over the head but it keep rolling back to that half way position.We went to the emergency room because it was very painful for him leaving it that way.Turns out there is a name for what he had, Paraphimosis.Go to this web address http://www.emedicine.com/MED/topic2874.htm and make sure to scroll down and read in the body of the papagraphs there is a link to view the images, they looked alot worse than my sons but I am taking the time to write all this to you young men so you can learn what happens if you don't clean properly or have this painful thing happen to you!

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A female reader, MomOfaBoy United States +, writes (10 August 2008):

Ok boys, i just got back from the emergency room with my 17 yr old son.He was circumcised when he was a baby but they didn't cut back enough so it looked like he had never been circumcised to begin with.Throughout the years, I had always know to pull the skin back and wash and dry it daily, but once he got older and started bathing himself, he didn't do this even though I reminded him that he should, yeah-yeah Mom he would say.I warned him that if he didn't do this the skin would stick to the sides and become attached to the head of his penis and that when it came time to have sex it would not pull back correctly as he was entering her and even be painful when he tried.Well, he finally started listening to me and started to try and clean it properly but it was too late, it had stuck to the sides of his penis and would not pull back to expose the head of his penis.We made a appointment with the Dr and he examined him and said he would have to have a circumcision.The next day he started to really try and get the skin to pull back and a little did but it was very painful and it made a small tear on the side of the head plus it got stuck in a halfway retracted position,you could only see half of the head of his penis,and it stayed that way!He tried to pull the skin back over the head but it keep rolling back to that half way position.We went to the emergency room because it was very painful for him leaving it that way.Turns out there is a name for what he had, Paraphimosis.Go to this web address http://www.emedicine.com/MED/topic2874.htm and make sure to scroll down and read in the body of the papagraphs there is a link to view the images, they looked alot worse than my sons but I am taking the time to write all this to you young men so you can learn what happens if you don't clean properly or have this painful thing happen to you!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2008):

I cant pull mines back either, I was told by my docter it was not uncommon and to clean it with soap and water every day inside and out and make sure to dry. If you do have sex you have to use a condom, because if you can't pull the forskin back there is an infection and you dont want to pass that on. Don't worry though because you just have to clean it. You could speed it up by buying a cream from say wal-mart for $4. good luck

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2008):

Hey I'm 17 years old and have the same thing, the foreskin wont go back and it's because there is a little piece of something like skin connecting the head to the skin, IT WILL NOT HURT DURING SEX, TRUST ME.

If you're too embarrassed to go to the doctor then all you can do is take hot baths and just slowly start to work it back, do this over and over for a few weeks and it will eventually go over without the bath, when that happens, start using a lotion and try it, the lotion is because the head will be very sensitive after not being touched so this will reduce the sensitivity pain.

That's about all I can say, like I said, I have the same thing and I've had sex without any pain or problems.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2007):

i am not a virgin i have this problem the first time i had sex it pulled back suprisingly it dident hurt it was more of a shock bc i also dident no it was sapose to but now it wont pull back when your putting your penis in try to keep your hand on it and sort of push skin up worked for me with no pain and still felt grate

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2007):

hey, if you take a hot bath every day, let your foreskin absorb the water and the heat will make it softer and more felxible. after about 6 minutes in the bath, start to streth the skin, you can try to put a clean finger into it or simply grab it and stretch. be sure to do it very gently and slowly, no need to rush it as it can cause tearing or uncomfort. if this doesnt work, go to a doctor. they can give you many alternatives to circumcisions such as hormone creams that will make the skin more pliable and loose. good luck

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2007):

no, i have the same problem...i have no idea how to fix it but from browsing the internet i have heard that circumcision is the only option...or leave it be. and me, being a fellow virgin am haveing the same fears even though i know that wont e for a while on account of my age.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2006):

i have the same problem but i mastrubate alot and the skin has streched a little but still hurts and doesnt go back over the head

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A female reader, willywombat United Kingdom +, writes (25 January 2006):

willywombat agony auntGo see your GP. This sounds like a problem that he/she can help you with.

I wish you good luck and happy times.x

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A female reader, Wendyg United Kingdom +, writes (6 January 2006):

Wendyg agony auntMaybe you might need to take a trip to the doctor to see if anything else can be done rather than forcing it... the frenulum can snap you know! I wouldnt just keep pulling it back until it hurts as this could actually cause damage! Some men are just born with a short frenulum, some it doesnt cause a problem to, others it can be very uncomfortable... ask the doctor, if this is causing real bad problems its best to get it looked at and fixed now than to have it snap later on! The advice that this is the same for every virgin male isnt true! we are all different, ive known men that have had sex for years, thinking this was normal to be this tight, and they had pain after and during sex, and it wasnt until later on in life they did something about it and wished they had done it sooner... get checked out, it will be the best in the long run.

Take care

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2006):

my bf had the same problem. in fact, at 24, he didn't even know it was supposed to retract until i told him so, bc it never had before. all he knew was it hurt if he pulled on it, so he never did. you should have seen the surprised look on his face the first time i showed him what it looked like underneath. it was like he was seeing his penis for the first time at 24 (in fact, he was).

anyway, don't worry - he's fine now. the thing you need to do is just stretch the piece of skin that connects the foreskin to the tip of your penis (called the frenulum), which is easy enough to do. to start out, try doing it when you're not fully erect; it'll be easier. try to pull it down a little further each day. if you masturbate, that's a good time to do it.

it too me and my bf about 2 months to get his foreskin to where it would come down. it's still really tight, but i can push it down below the head with my hand, as long as i do it slowly, and it doesn't hurt him.

for more tips, try a google search on 'foreskin won't retract' - you'll find loads of advice

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2006):

this is the same for every virgin male.. it wont go back easily cuz it never has done before... i suggest pullin it back till hurts then a lil more every day.. and using some sort of lube would be even better.. it will take a while but eventually it'll get easier and easier to pull back

oh and dont use any alcohol based lotions if ur gonna use anythin like that.. (it hurts)

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